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The Hidden Risks of Over-monitoring Kids Online

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Parents feel a heavy burden to protect their kids from online harm. Threats such as cyber-bullying, predators, and unwanted content are real, and it’s understandable to want to put tight restrictions in place. But what if the very tools we use to protect our children are creating unintended consequences? Over-monitoring can undermine trust, limit children’s development of independence and online resilience, and even expose privacy vulnerabilities. Here’s what the research shows and how parents can find the perfect balance.

Where did we go wrong?

66% of parents surveyed say that parenting is harder today than 20 years ago, and digital technology is to blame.[1] Parents monitor in a variety of ways, including limiting screen time, checking websites, requiring password access, using GPS tracking, and checking social media following/friending.[1] Yes, tighter supervision sounds like a necessary solution in a world full of endless apps, social networks, and online risks, but is it?

A study conducted by the University of Central Florida found that parental-control apps, which allow for deep monitoring of children’s online activities, were associated with more, not fewer, online risks for teens. More specifically, the study found that teens whose parents used these apps reported unwanted explicit content, online harassment, and sexual solicitations. This doesn’t mean monitoring caused the risks; instead, parents often turn to these apps because their teens are already encountering online issues. The researchers concluded that instead of building digital competence and trust, many of these apps fostered a control-heavy and distrusting family environment.[2] So, instead of turning to these apps for help, try Dr. Bennett’s Connected Family Course.

Another study of children’s apps found that even “family-friendly” apps often include trackers, location permissions, or mislabeling of age ratings.[4] Further, children and teens with over-monitoring parents saw their parents as intrusive and were more likely to hide, deceive, and intentionally misbehave.[4] All in all, when monitoring feels oppressive, kids may respond by hiding and lying rather than being open and honest.

What does that mean for parents?

If the goal is safety, forced online surveillance may undermine the trust between parent and child and may hinder the open and honest communication we should be working to establish. As we teach in our Screen Safety Essentials Course for families, just implementing controls isn’t enough. One of the most damaging costs of over-monitoring is to trust and self-regulation. When children know they are constantly being watched, they may feel that their parents don’t believe they are capable of making responsible choices. That can lead to secrecy, feelings of giving up on communicating openly, and a lack of connection or engagement with parents.

“Why tell mom and dad if they won’t believe me anyway?”

I found myself asking this exact question at 12 years old when I made my first Facebook account and kept it a secret. I didn’t want to get in trouble, and I wanted to connect with my friends outside of school. I felt left out. But, when I asked my mom if I could open my own account, she said no. When I asked her why, she had no answer. So, I took it upon myself to create an account anyway.

I lied about my age so that I could create the account without parental supervision, and I kept it a secret. I would use it when she was not paying attention. My intentions were pure, and I did use it to connect with friends. But, of course, like with all online platforms, creepy older men would try to befriend me or message me.

GetKidsInternetSafe’s mission is to improve parent-child relationships AND screen safety. Had my mom and I had access to the GKIS Social Media Readiness Course, we would have been able to find a safer middle ground for me to connect to my friends. Not only would I have learned more about screen safety and been better equipped to solve online problems independently, but my parents and I would have engaged in healthier conversations and maybe even gotten closer. Ultimately, I would have been prepared to protect myself from getting into a relationship with a 17-year-old. Read The Hidden Dangers of Online Grooming: I Was Only 13, to find out how my lack of preparation for having social media resulted in me forming a premature physical relationship with a young man who was four years older than me at that time.

How Can We Do Better?

One of the most effective ways to guide children safely online isn’t through hidden surveillance, but through connection, conversation, and shared agreements. When parents begin by listening to their children about what worries them, what they enjoy, and what feels out of control, they build a foundation of trust. That trust becomes the launch pad for screen-time guidelines, digital boundaries, and the kind of autonomy children need to develop resilience. GKIS emphasizes this approach through its Connected Family Screen Agreement, a free tool designed to invite open dialogue instead of enforcing silence. It helps kids understand why parents have concerns and utilize safety tools and techniques.

Instead of solely relying on rigid controls, the path to healthier online habits includes tools, skill-building, and gradual transition. GKIS’s Screen Safety Toolkit isn’t a spy-kit; it’s a resource for families to use as practical checklists, conversational prompts, and strategies to empower children rather than just restricting them.

By investing in tools like this, parents can shift from pushing their kids to secrecy to creating a trusting relationship through honest communication. This way, your child knows that they are safe, supported, and ready to navigate the digital world with you by their side.

 

Thanks to CSUCI intern, Elaha Qudratulla, for researching and sharing an important story about how online safety is more important than online policing.

I’m the mom psychologist who will help you GetKidsInternetSafe.

Onward to More Awesome Parenting,

Tracy S. Bennett, Ph.D.
Mom, Clinical Psychologist, CSUCI Adjunct Faculty
GetKidsInternetSafe.com

Works Cited

[1] https://www.pewresearch.org/internet/2020/07/28/parenting-children-in-the-age-of-screens/

[2] https://www.ucf.edu/news/apps-keep-children-safe-online-may-counterproductive/

[3] https://arxiv.org/pdf/2303.09008

[4] https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0140197117302051

 

Photos Cited

[1] Rizki Kurniawan

[2] Marten Newhall

[3] Tasha Kostyuk

[4] Vitaly Gariev

https://unsplash.com/

Off the Phone and On the Soccer Field: My Cure for Digital Disconnection

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Kids crave connection. Face-to-face interaction and emotional closeness are vital for healthy development—particularly for adolescents.[1] Screen time offers shallow connections and distracts kids from those unpleasant cravings. It also keeps kids so busy that they don’t seek the connection they so desperately need. What if they didn’t have to be so lonely? What if there was a way they could be off their screens, doing something good for their health, and making friends at the same time?  For me, that was playing sports.

The Seed Was Planted

As a child, I was most excited to hang out with my friends, be on my phone, watch TV, or eat sweets, in that order. That was until I joined a team sport.

It all started when my mother asked me if I wanted to join the local soccer team. I was nine years old and against the idea because I didn’t want it to cut into cartoon time on the weekends, and had we gone through the Screen Safety Essentials Course, we wouldn’t have worried so much about the impact of screens on us. But she insisted. I only agreed because my favorite cousins were on the team.

I learned from the first practice that I loved the intense physical activity of soccer, and after a while, I began to really get the hang of it. I felt proud and accomplished. I made great friends on the team. We loved team bonding activities and even began to hang out outside of practice. I loved it so much, I gave it my all and looked forward to it all week.

By high school, I had won medals and genuinely felt like I was good at the sport. I received praise and encouragement for all of my efforts and hard work. It also inspired me to work hard in other aspects of my life. I tried harder in school, was friendlier with classmates, more obedient in class, and more eager to participate in the learning process. According to Project Play, high school athletes are more likely to further their education and even receive higher grades in college.[2] I started seeing everything in the world as a skill waiting to be attained, something that required courage, effort, and training.

Having that view of the world helped me when I sprained my ankle right before the start of my freshman season. While recovering, I could have easily scrolled through Snapchat and Instagram endlessly. But I wanted to make sure I continued to build the bond with my teammates for when I returned. It taught me to wait my turn, keep a positive attitude, remain patient, and support others as they shine. As soon as I recovered, my teammates were more than happy to catch me up to speed, and I rebuilt my strength.

Core Memories That Last

One of my most memorable moments taught me something I will never forget. It was my junior year; we were tied 0-0, with a minute left in the game. My team was exhausted, but as captain, I knew this is where my job was most important. I dribbled the ball up the center, dodging two midfielders and one defender, set it up for my left forward, and yelled, “SHOOT!” She shot and sent it straight into the upper right corner of the goal. Everyone who was there to support us was on their feet, our coaches were throwing their clipboards in the air and hugging each other, and our teammates ran to us for a celebratory hug and a jump around. We spent the last 15 seconds of that game with tears in our eyes and joy in our hearts. We had just beaten a 40-year record for our school!

This is when I realized this would have a lifelong impact on me. It was one of those moments that I’ll look back on happily. It was a lifetime of preparation to become someone people could rely on when things got tough and hope felt lost. It was the moment I truly understood what being a leader meant to me and the impact it had on others.

I hugged and thanked my mother for signing me up for soccer at nine years old. She introduced me to the first love of my life, and I would forever be grateful for that. From then on, I never doubted my abilities to get something done, never lost confidence in myself, and never hurt someone without apologizing or broke something without trying to replace it.

The Impact of The Beautiful Game

Project Play reports that sports, in particular, can positively impact aspects of personal development among young people, keep them away from harmful substances, and encourage cognitive, educational, and mental health benefits.[2] I believe my experience of playing soccer was so much more than just a fun sport or a way to stay active, although both are tried and true. It was a refinement of my character, it was a positive shift in how I viewed the world and myself in it, it was what taught me that rejection was just redirection, and it was a way to build and maintain connections with people I am still close to, at 27 years old.

Why Everyone Should Play Sports

Participation in sports can protect against the development of mental health disorders.[4] These benefits include lowering stress levels, rates of anxiety and depression.[5]Lifelong participation in sports leads to improved mental health outcomes and even immediate psychological benefits which continue long after participation is over with. The improve self-confidence, encourage creativity, and nurture a higher self-esteem. Statistically, adolescents who play sports are eight times more likely to be physically active at age 24.[3]


Thanks to CSUCI intern, Elaha Qudratulla, for sharing an important story about how beneficial playing sports were for her then and how it still helps her today.

I’m the mom psychologist who will help you GetKidsInternetSafe.

Onward to More Awesome Parenting,

Tracy S. Bennett, Ph.D.
Mom, Clinical Psychologist, CSUCI Adjunct Faculty
GetKidsInternetSafe.com

 

Works Cited:

[1] https://www.uvpediatrics.com/topics/alone-together-how-smartphones-and-social-media-contribute-to-social-deprivation-in-youth

[2] https://projectplay.org/youth-sports/facts/benefits

[3] https://odphp.health.gov/sites/default/files/2020-09/YSS_Report_OnePager_2020-08-31_web.pdf

[4] https://baca.org/blog/does-playing-organized-youth-sports-have-an-impact-on-adult-mental-health/

[5] https://pce.sandiego.edu/child-development-through-sports/

Photos Cited:

[Header] Eva Wahyuni on UnSplash

[2] Olivia Hibbins on UnSplash

[3] Elaha Qudratulla

[4] Jeffrey F Lin on UnSplash

[5] Elaha Qudratulla

https://unsplash.com/

Hackers Can Access Your Computer’s Webcam Without Your Knowledge

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Imagine finding out that a cybercriminal has been recording you in your bedroom for months and can do anything with that footage. Or what if you turn on your computer to find that you can’t access anything unless you pay a ransom to a hacker. What if a predator could view and speak to your child through a camera in their bedroom? You can help protect your family from becoming victims of cyber-attacks and ensure peace of mind by referring to our Screen Safety Toolkit, a resource guide with our best recommendations, how-to information, and links to our favorite easy-to-use parental control systems. This article will detail the risks and worst-case scenarios of webcam hacking as well as provide tips to help ensure your cybersecurity and safety.

How do cybercriminals hack webcams?

Hacking requires a specialized skillset that is increasingly accessible for the average tech user. In the sub-world of black hat computer hacking (hacking tech with bad intent), accessing private webcams is considered fairly easy. Further, there are several different methods utilized by black hat hackers to gain access to and take control over a computer’s web camera.

Spyware

One of the prominent methods employed by hackers to gain access to private computer webcams is through the use of spy software and remote administration tools (RATs). Webcam spyware is a type of computer application or program that allows the user to remotely take control over another user’s webcam. This enables the hacker to see whatever or whoever is in front of the computer’s web camera.

An alarming feature of this software is that it often allows the user to remotely turn the hacked computer on. Turning a computer off when it’s not being used is not enough to protect users from being spied on.

Spyware can be installed in webcam attachments and hard-wired webcams. The hacker can control audio and microphones, camera angles, zoom features, and focus. They can also record the footage so they can blackmail the victim later. Surprisingly, webcam spyware is freely available for download on the internet and can be installed on most operating systems.[1]

Internet Connection

Another common method of webcam hacking involves the use of web cameras that rely on remote access through WiFi. A common example of this type of web camera includes wireless security devices such as the popular Ring video doorbell.

Unfortunately, while these devices are intended to provide security for the user, they can also provide black hat hackers access to your home. If a camera is connected to a home WiFi router, it is vulnerable to hacking, especially if proper precautions aren’t taken to secure it. To avoid this, it is important to set secure network passwords for home WiFi routers. The default factory setting login information for routers can be accessed by anyone who is willing to look up the manufacturer’s startup support webpage. Failing to change your default router login can leave your wireless security cameras open to malicious hackers.[1]

Trojan Viruses

Perhaps the easiest way for cybercriminals to hack into your computer’s webcam is through the use of a Trojan computer virus. A Trojan virus is a type of malware deliberately designed to cause damage by infecting and subsequently taking control over your device. It is aptly named after the famous ancient Greek war story of the Trojan Horse because it is an attack disguised as a gift.

Trojan viruses are so effective because people mistakenly infect their own devices with them by downloading software that they believe is safe. This typically occurs when visiting a website that invites you to download a seemingly innocent file that actually contains malware instead of Adobe flash reader. The malware then infects the device, allowing the creator of the virus to gain complete control and access to your webcam and private files without your knowledge.[1,2]

Worst-Case Scenarios

Cassidy Wolf, Miss Teen USA

One of the most famous cases detailing the devastation caused by webcam hacking involves former Miss Teen USA, Cassidy Wolf. In 2012, Cassidy Wolf opened an email that she had received from someone whom she did not know. She was horrified to discover an attachment within the email containing several nude photos of her that were taken in the privacy of her bedroom. The photos were taken via the webcam installed on her computer.

The hacker attempted to blackmail Wolf into engaging in sexual acts with him through her webcam. If she refused, he threatened to share the nude photos with her friends and family.

The hacker turned out to be one of Wolf’s former classmates, Jared James Abrahams, who had installed Blackshades malware onto her laptop. The FBI was able to identify Abrahams who had victimized up to 150 women in his sextortion scheme and was subsequently sentenced to 18 months in federal prison.[3]

This event coincided with an FBI crackdown that led to the arrests of over 100 cybercriminals who created and used Blackshades, an inexpensive and easily utilized remote access tool primarily designed to hack webcams to facilitate sextortion crime. Blackshades was available for a mere $40 and sadly, countless people were victimized by the cybercriminals who maliciously employed it. [3,4]

Ring Cameras

In 2019, a mother installed a Ring security camera in the bedroom of her 8-year-old daughter for extra security. In a disturbing exchange caught on video, the 8-year-old girl walked into her room hearing strange music playing from an unknown source. The music abruptly stopped, and a man’s voice was heard saying “hello there.” This strange man had live video access of the young girl and was able to verbally communicate with her, a feature deliberately programmed into the Ring security camera. The man repeatedly used racial slurs when speaking to the girl and over several minutes, tried to get her to do various things. There have been similar Ring camera hacking incidents in recent years.[5]

Steps to Protect Your Privacy and Boost Cybersecurity

Technology is a powerful tool and with the advent of virtual learning and Zoom conferences as a result of the COVID-19 pandemic, web cameras have become an essential part of our academic and professional lives. Cases of webcam hacking are obviously terrifying, but there are simple steps that you can take to protect yourself and your family from attacks by cybercriminals.

Use Software Updates

Keep up with computer and software update alerts. They often contain patches For Weak Spots (points of entry easily exploited by hackers).

Secure Your WiFi with Password Protection

Once you have installed your router, create a new secure password to deter cybercriminals from being able to easily hack your devices.

Avoid Suspicious Downloads

Hackers can access your devices by getting you to unknowingly install malware, like Trojan viruses, through random links and downloads. Never click on links from websites that require you to download a file or program in order to access their site. Also, avoid downloading attachments and opening links sent via email from people you do not know and trust.

Invest in Security Software

While there are free security software services available, investing in subscription software will provide better cybersecurity. Approach your cybersecurity with the same regard as you do for your home security. Good security software will help protect you by blocking malware that would potentially give hackers access to your devices.

Use Legitimate Tech Support

Be careful of who you allow access to your devices. When IT support is needed, only use trusted and reputable services. Avoid using freelance computer technicians. There have been instances where freelance technicians who were hired to fix devices have instead installed malware onto the client’s computers for nefarious purposes.

Install a Physical Webcam Cover

The most surefire way to ensure that cybercriminals are not spying on you through your device’s camera is to install a physical covering over the lens. When most web cameras are on, a light next to the lens turns on signaling that the camera is in use. However, hackers can disable this light, so relying on that alone is not enough to ensure your privacy. There are products available specifically designed as device camera coverings that attach to your devices right over the camera lens. The covering can be slid open when you want to use your camera and closed when you do not. You can also just simply cover your web camera lens with a post-it note or a piece of opaque tape.

GKIS Screen Safety Toolkit

Our Screen Safety Toolkit is an invaluable resource for providing you and your family with enhanced cybersecurity. Researching digital safety tools can be an overwhelming process. But thankfully, we’ve done the work for you! If you have screen-loving kids or teens, sound parenting strategies are not enough for fostering online safety. You also need smart tech tools for filtering, monitoring, and management. The GKIS Screen Safety Toolkit is a family-tested, outcome-based resource guide with our best recommendations, how-to information, and links to our favorite easy-to-use parental control systems.

GKIS Cyber Security Supplement

Our Cybersecurity & Red Flags Supplement is comprised of three helpful tools in one service. You can protect your family from hacking, scamming, malware, and phishing with our cybersecurity and best practices checklist. Our GKIS online safety red flags for kids & teens provides parents with Dr. Bennett’s clinical teaching list that will help parents educate their kids about red flags to be aware of and alert them to the tricks that are often employed by online predators and other cybercriminals. Additionally, our GKIS online safety red flags for parents will provide parents with Dr. Bennett’s clinical expertise, which she’s developed over 25+ years as a clinical psychologist, in identifying behavioral red flags that may signal your child is suffering from digital injury.

Other helpful GKIS resources

You can find more valuable information regarding screen safety in Dr. Bennett’s parenting guide, Screen Time in the Mean Time. Additionally, you can check out this article How Cybercriminals Steal Sensitive Data to learn more about the potential risks to your cybersecurity so that you can be better equipped to protect yourself and your family.

Thanks to CSUCI intern, Mackenzie Morrow for researching the dangers of webcam hacking as well as cybersecurity measures to prevent it and co-authoring this article.

I’m the mom psychologist who will help you GetKidsInternetSafe.

Onward to More Awesome Parenting,

Tracy S. Bennett, Ph.D.
Mom, Clinical Psychologist, CSUCI Adjunct Faculty
GetKidsInternetSafe.com

Works Cited

[1] Batt, S. (2020). How easy is it for someone to hack your webcam? Make Use Of. https://www.makeuseof.com/tag/how-easy-is-it-for-someone-to-hack-your-webcam/

[2] Johansen, A. (2020). What is a Trojan? Is it a virus or is it malware? Norton. https://us.norton.com/internetsecurity-malware-what-is-a-trojan.html

[3] Daily Mail. (2014). More than 90 people arrested in ‘creepware’ hacker sting as victim Miss Teen USA describes ‘terror’ at being watched through her webcam for a year. Daily Mail. https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2638874/More-90-people-nabbed-creepware-hacker-sting-victim-Miss-Teen-USA-describes-terror-watched-webcam-YEAR.html

[4] Cooper, A. (2014). CNN Anderson 360 Cassidy Wolf Miss Teen USA. CNN. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sc3nG87OYW8

[5] Chiu, A. (2019). She installed a Ring camera in her children’s room for ‘peace of mind.’ A hacker accessed it and harassed her 8-year-old daughter. The Washington Post. https://www.washingtonpost.com/nation/2019/12/12/she-installed-ring-camera-her-childrens-room-peace-mind-hacker-accessed-it-harassed-her-year-old-daughter/

Photos Credited

Photo by Nikita Belokhonav (https://www.pexels.com/photo/anonymous-hacker-with-on-laptop-in-white-room-5829726/)

Photo by cottonbro (https://www.pexels.com/photo/people-woman-coffee-laptop-6964510/)

Photo by cottonbro (https://www.pexels.com/photo/laptop-with-cyber-security-text-on-the-screen-5483240/)

Feeling Lonely? Tips to Make Friends Offline and Online

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Socialization is a critical aspect to good health for kids and adults.[1][2] That’s why constant connection through social media, chatrooms, texting, and online gaming has become irresistible to us. For help managing in the online world and avoiding costly digital injuries, check out Dr. Bennett’s positive parenting and family coaching videos in our Screen Safety Essentials Course. We all need each other online and off. Afterall, the early people of our species were hunters and gatherers. Having a tribe was critical for our survival. In modern times, with many families living away from extended families and our lives as busy as ever, it’s often hard for adults to make friends. Today’s GKIS article covers the costly results of loneliness and offers suggestions for how to break out of our loneliness and enter the realm of meaningful connectedness.

The Prevalence of Loneliness

Higher rates of loneliness are found among young adults, seniors, those who are visually impaired, victims of abuse, and the unemployed.[3] Due to its prevalence, numerous outlets including Time, Forbes, US News, Cigna Insurance, and the Health Resources & Services Administration have referred to loneliness as an epidemic in the last decade.

Feelings of loneliness can result from a lack of friendships, intimacy, or emotional connection.[4] The long-term impacts of loneliness include poor sleep, depression, suicidal ideation, increases in cortisol (a stress hormone), compromised immune responses, and inflammation. Chronic loneliness has also been linked to the progression of Alzheimer’s, cardiovascular disease, and other chronic diseases. Further, loneliness is associated with poor lifestyle habits which include sedentariness and smoking.[5]

To avoid unfortunate outcomes, we must carve out the time to hang out with friends and family. For kids and teens, school is an easy resource to draw from. But for adults, social resources can be hard to find. To help you reach out and find more connection and community in your life, we’ve uncovered some novel ideas and resources!

Finding Community in Person

Volunteer

Volunteering is a fantastic way to meet friends, give back, and cultivate a sense of belonging. Research has found that volunteering is particularly helpful for those who have recently lost a loved one. In a study by Dawn Carr and colleagues observing over 5,000 recently widowed spouses, subjects who volunteered two or more hours per week had lower rates of loneliness than those who did not volunteer at all.[6]

Volunteering also has benefits for the whole family. The University of Nebraska-Lincoln Extension notes that youth volunteerism can help with the development of identity, empathy, skill-building, self-esteem, and relationships with like-minded people.[7] A study by Sandi Nenga from Southwestern University notes similar improvements in youth volunteerism. But Nenga also emphasizes that volunteering can connect multiple, diverse communities, creating better outcomes in future civic roles for youth volunteers.[8]

Join a gym

Many gyms offer classes like Zumba, pilates, yoga, kickboxing, and barre. Attending exercise classes provides opportunities to talk with others and explore your workout journeys together!

Exercise is associated with decreases in stress hormones including cortisol and adrenaline, and promotes the production of mood-enhancing endorphins.[9] For those who have social anxiety, these feel-good-feelings can help you gain confidence in seeking and maintaining new relationships.

Join a club or team

Clubs and teams offer great opportunities to make new friends and work together. Bulletins for clubs and teams may be found at your local college campus or community recreation center. A study by Scott Graupensperger and colleagues notes that being on a club sports team results in greater prosocial behaviors. Additionally, being on a team creates a strong sense of community and bonds, thus enhancing identification with others. A greater sense of identification can improve one’s mental health, social life, and well-being.[10]

Find Community Online

Online resources have made meeting like-minded people easier than ever. Today’s platforms allow us to connect with a host of individuals and groups that offer various forms of entertainment whether it is sushi classes, book clubs, or family potlucks! Of course, proper cautions are necessary when meeting people online. To help tweens and teens prepare for the potential hazards that await them on social media, we recommend they take our Social Media Readiness Course. This online course not only offers the information they need to stay safe, Dr. Bennett also shares critical wellness strategies she’s developed in over 25 years of clinical practice! Here are 4 GKIS recommended online platforms to help you connect with others

Meetup

Meetup.com is a great website to start your search for like-minded people. The groups available are diverse and range from substance abuse support groups to groups for beginner hikers! Some groups are also geared towards entire families and may host events to bring families together. You can also create your own group, however, a monthly charge to Meetup is needed to keep your group active.

Hey! VINA

Hey! VINA is a free new app with a design similar to the dating app Tinder. Hey! Vina is geared toward women and nonbinary people looking to make friends with other women and nonbinary people. The VIP membership gives users special access to certain features including faster matches, seeing who swiped right on (liked) your profile, and more.

The Dinner Party

The Dinner Party is an organization founded in 2018. The purpose of this organization is to bring grieving individuals who are between the ages 20 to 39 together. The intent is to connect and provide support for each other over dinner. They also expanded to create dinner parties for a wider audience of individuals who may be dealing with a different type of issue and would like a companion to talk to. To accommodate the recent COVID-19 guidelines, individuals are currently hosting Zoom dinner parties as a safer way to get together.

Eventbrite

Eventbrite is a popular platform used to get tickets for live events ranging from stadium concerts to yoga meetups at the park. While the service is free, the organizer of the event may require a small fee to attend while others offer their events for free.

 

Thanks to CSUCI intern, Avery Flower for researching ways to battle loneliness, and for co-authoring this article.

I’m the mom psychologist who will help you GetKidsInternetSafe.

Onward to More Awesome Parenting,

Tracy S. Bennett, Ph.D.
Mom, Clinical Psychologist, CSUCI Adjunct Faculty
GetKidsInternetSafe

Photo Credits

Photo by fauxels from Pexels

Photo by Engin Akyurt from Pexels

Photo by RODNAE Productions from Pexels

Photo by janeb13 from Pixabay

Photo by Gift Habeshaw from Unsplash

Photo by Guduru Ajay bhargav from Pexels

 

Works Cited

[1] Williams, C. Y. K., Townson, A. T., Kapur, M., Ferreira, A. F., Nunn, R., Galante, J., Phillips, V., Gentry, S., & Usher-Smith, J. A. (2021). Interventions to reduce social isolation and loneliness during COVID-19 physical distancing measures: A rapid systematic review. PLoS ONE, 16(2). https://doi-org.ezproxy.csuci.edu/10.1371/journal.pone.0247139

[2] Lun, V. M.-C., & Bond, M. H. (2016). Achieving subjective well-being around the world: The moderating influence of gender, age and national goals for socializing children. Journal of Happiness Studies: An Interdisciplinary Forum on Subjective Well-Being, 17(2), 587–608. https://doi-org.ezproxy.csuci.edu/10.1007/s10902-015-9614-z

[3]Brunes, A., Hansen, M. B., & Heir, T. (2019). Loneliness among adults with visual impairment: Prevalence, associated factors, and relationship to life satisfaction. Health and Quality of Life Outcomes, 17. https://doi-org.ezproxy.csuci.edu/10.1186/s12955-019-1096-y

[4] Tiwari, S. (2013). Loneliness: A disease? Indian Journal of Psychiatry, 55(4), 320. doi:10.4103/0019-5545.120536

[5] Beutel, M. E., Klein, E. M., Brähler, E., Reiner, I., Jünger, C., Michal, M., Wiltink, J., Wild, P. S., Münzel, T., Lackner, K. J., & Tibubos, A. N. (2017). Loneliness in the general population: Prevalence, determinants and relations to mental health. BMC Psychiatry, 17.

[6]Carr, D. C., Kail, B. L., Matz-Costa, C., & Shavit, Y. Z. (2018). Does becoming a volunteer attenuate loneliness among recently widowed older adults? The Journals of Gerontology: Series B: Psychological Sciences and Social Sciences, 73(3), 501–510. https://doi-org.ezproxy.csuci.edu/10.1093/geronb/gbx092

[7] de Guzman, M. (2007). Youth Volunteerism. Retrieved from https://extensionpublications.unl.edu/assets/pdf/g1750.pdf

[8]Nenga, S. K. (2012). Not the community, but a community: Transforming youth into citizens through volunteer work. Journal of Youth Studies, 15(8), 1063–1077. https://doi-org.ezproxy.csuci.edu/10.1080/13676261.2012.697135

[9] Harvard Health Publishing. (2011). Exercising to relax. Retrieved from https://www.health.harvard.edu/staying-healthy/exercising-to-relax

[10]Graupensperger, S., Panza, M., & Evans, M. B. (2020). Network centrality, group density, and strength of social identification in college club sport teams. Group Dynamics: Theory, Research, and Practice, 24(2), 59–73. https://doi-org.ezproxy.csuci.edu/10.1037/gdn0000106

3 GKIS Recommended Tips for Responding to Child Screen Withdrawal

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Ninety-eight percent of American homes with kids under eight years old have a mobile screen device.[1] Often children as young as three years old have their own! These bright, glowing, pieces of technology are incredibly attractive for the developing mind, so it’s no wonder kids may feel agitated, bored, or stressed when they must put it down and get to homework. Tantrums at the end of screen time may be a sign of screen addiction. If you worry your child has the potential for screen addiction, empower yourself with the knowledge and expertise provided through Dr. Bennett’s Screen Safety Essentials Course. This program offers weekly parent and family-oriented coaching videos designed to provide you with the information, tips, and tricks that the modern family needs to use screens while staying safe and connected. Today’s article offers 3 GKIS recommended tips to effectively deal with these symptoms.

Hyperarousal & Screen Addiction

Immersing oneself with a screen device is associated with hyperarousal of our nervous system.[2] This type of arousal is associated with irritability in adults and tantrums in children.

Following hyperarousal, the brain attempts to return to balance with an opposite response. Sometimes this results in fatigue and low energy – as in “what goes up must come down.” Some consider this crash to be evidence of addictive withdrawal.

If your child is allowed too much screen time, especially with intense content, expect a tantrum followed by fatigue. Further, if a child repeatedly undergoes this neurological rollercoaster unchecked, excessive screen time can result in chronic mental health conditions.

A study by Anita Restrepo and colleagues analyzed 564 children and their screen usage. They found that the children with problematic internet use suffered from higher rates of sleep disturbance, depressive episodes, and a reduction in healthy behavior.[3] Gaming addiction symptoms, such as feelings of loss of control and play despite negative consequences to school and relationships, can also result from unchecked screen time.

Dr. Tracy Bennett developed the Social Media Readiness Course to empower tweens and teens to employ wellness strategies themselves. Utilizing these techniques backed by research and experience by Dr. B’s 25+ years in the field will aid in retraining your kid’s brain. Our course not only teaches screen use moderation but also offers important information about potential sources of digital injury and critical psychological wellness tools.

Validation and Support

If your child is demonstrating severe meltdowns after screen time, yelling at them will only escalate the situation. Instead, coach emotional stabilization by validating their experience (“You must feel really out of control right now”) and coaching them to calm down. Supportive teamwork teaches important wellness skills, builds problem-solving and resilience, and ultimately results in greater autonomy and less conflict and resentment.

Psychologists Shin and Kim analyzed two types of parenting approaches with screen use among 303 parents. Active mediation emphasizes family discussions about screen use. Restrictive mediation emphasizes one-sided rule-setting for screen devices. Families that use active mediation demonstrated better outcomes than those who preferred restrictive mediation.[4]

When a child is involved in family decision-making, they are given a greater sense of confidence and autonomy. As a result, they have a lower chance of developing resentment.[5] Completing a digital contract, like our free GKIS Connected Family Screen Agreement, is an awesome way to get started with cooperative dialogue and accountability!

Providing Incentive

Following through with priorities and practicing work before play are important life skills. This can be challenging for children when online work feels tedious, boring, and lacks a clear payoff. If your child seems to lose steam and get distracted with online work, rewarding effort with incentives can be helpful.

A study by Radhakrishnan and colleagues looking at 201 students found that giving incentives to complete homework increased their performance and completion rates.[6] Incentives can be material like a new toy, or experiential like a family picnic.

Material incentives are great occasionally but try not to let this be the only motivator that keeps your kid going. Dr. Bennett finds that kids habituate quickly from material rewards and they fail to work overtime. She says family activities celebrating your kid’s hard work well-done ends up working far better, especially when utilizing reward charts and checklists like the Bennett Boxes technique found in her book Screen Time in the Mean Time.

Don’t Give In

Children are incredibly clever at implementing pester power. Pester power wears us down until we cave and give in to their demands for toys, games, and screen time. Sometimes we might simply be exhausted and give them a “fine, 30 more minutes.” But what just happened there is a learning moment for your child. They learn that by bugging you incessantly, they will be rewarded

This parent-child dynamic exemplifies intermittent reinforcement, which means that a behavior that is rewarded occasionally will dramatically increase that behavior—just like with gambling. Once a behavior has been reinforced in this way, it’s more difficult to “undo” it later.[7]

To avoid this trap, stick to your rules with consistency and follow-through. This teaches your child that they can trust your word, and it’s not worth the fight to argue.

 

Thanks to CSUCI intern, Avery Flower for researching effective ways to deal with behavioral issues, and for co-authoring this article.

I’m the mom psychologist who will help you GetKidsInternetSafe.

Onward to More Awesome Parenting,

Tracy S. Bennett, Ph.D.
Mom, Clinical Psychologist, CSUCI Adjunct Faculty
GetKidsInternetSafe

 

Photo Credits

Photo by Snapwire from Pexels

Photo by Free-Photos from Pixabay

Photo by August de Richelieu from Pexels

Photo by August de Richelieu from Pexels

Photo by cottonbro from Pexels

 

Works Cited

[1] Common Sense Media. (2017). The Common Sense Census: Media Use By Kids Age Zero to Eight. Retrieved from https://www.commonsensemedia.org/sites/default/files/uploads/research/csm_zerotoeight_fullreport_release_2.pdf

[2] Dunckley, V. L. (2017, June). Electronic Screen Syndrome: Prevention and Treatment. Retrieved from https://connect.springerpub.com/content/book/978-0-8261-3373-1/part/part02/chapter/ch12

[3] Restrepo, A., Scheininger, T., Clucas, J., Alexander, L., Salum, G. A., Georgiades, K., Paksarian, D., Merikangas, K. R., & Milham, M. P. (2020). Problematic internet use in children and adolescents: Associations with psychiatric disorders and impairment. BMC Psychiatry, 20. https://doi-org.ezproxy.csuci.edu/10.1186/s12888-020-02640-x

[4] Shin, W., & Kim, H. K. (2019). What motivates parents to mediate children’s use of smartphones? An application of the theory of planned behavior. Journal of Broadcasting & Electronic Media, 63(1), 144–159. https://doi-org.ezproxy.csuci.edu/10.1080/08838151.2019.1576263

[5] Roth, G., Assor, A., Niemiec, C. P., Ryan, R. M., & Deci, E. L. (2009). The emotional and academic consequences of parental conditional regard: Comparing conditional positive regard, conditional negative regard, and autonomy support as parenting practices. Developmental Psychology, 45(4), 1119–1142. https://doi-org.ezproxy.csuci.edu/10.1037/a0015272

[6] Radhakrishnan, P., Lam, D., & Ho, G. (2009). Giving university students incentives to do homework improves their performance. Journal of Instructional Psychology, 36(3), 219–225.

[7] Bijou, S. W. (1957). Patterns of reinforcement and resistance to extinction in young children. Child Development, 28, 47–54. https://doi-org.ezproxy.csuci.edu/10.2307/1125999

How Smartphones Can Help Children with Dyslexia

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Most of us do not put much thought into reading, but not everybody has this privilege. Dyslexia is a cognitive disability that impacts someone’s abilities to read, write, or spell.[1] Letters that look similar and sound similar—such as n and m, w and m, and p, b, d, and q—are most frequently mixed up. To illustrate this, reading the sentence “Briana went to the park to walk her dog” may be read as “Briana wemt to the dark to malk her bog” for an individual with dyslexia. While some of us may mix these letters up occasionally, individuals with dyslexia chronically mix letters up to the point that it interferes with their daily life.

How common is dyslexia?

The DyslexiaHelp organization at the University of Michigan notes that 7 to 10% of the population have dyslexia. Individuals with dyslexia also represent around 70 to 80% of the population that have reading difficulties.[2] While dyslexia impairs an individual’s ability to read, write, or spell, this impairment does not affect one’s intelligence.

Dyslexia can lead to slow reading, poor language, messy handwriting, and a limited vocabulary. Behavioral issues such as tantrums, crying, and isolation may also manifest due to frustration. With proper treatment, impairment due to dyslexia can be improved. Children are especially adept at responding to treatment due to their remarkable ability to learn and adapt.

Assistive Technology

Assistive technology is a type of device or application designed to ease the symptoms of a disability.[3] In the case of treating symptoms of dyslexia, assistive technology has been refined throughout the years and garnered large satisfaction among users.

Scientists such as Tamik and Latif from the National University of Sciences and Technology are carrying out promising research for the development and accessibility of assistive technology for individuals with dyslexia. Putting the application they developed to the test, they found that their app helps significantly improves the writing for kids with dyslexia.[4] In a study by Draffan and colleagues looking at how assistive technology is used among 455 students with dyslexia, 90% of subjects found it helpful.[5]

Not only can assistive technology make things easier at the moment, but there can also be transfer effects which are benefits generalized to other things. A 2017 study by Lindeblad and colleagues put 35 children with dyslexia in a specialized program utilizing assistive technology applications. A year follow-up indicated that the children’s literacy increased at the same rate as their non-dyslexic peers.[6]

Maximizing Your Child’s Smartphone

Newer smartphones are becoming increasingly sophisticated and accessible for a diverse range of users. With smartphones, assistive technology is at our fingertips!

While a smartphone is easily accessible and can aid with alleviating symptoms of dyslexia, we at GKIS recommend that you consult with a school or private disability program prior to app adoption. Specialized programs will not only help you assess the severity of the learning disability, but they often give you access to specially designed tools that are straightforward and multifunctional.

Here are few steps on optimizing your kid’s smartphone experience:

Text-to-Speech

To have your smartphone read to you, simply highlight a word, sentence, or the entire page. To set this up on your iPhone, go to Settings -> Accessibility -> Spoken Content, then turn on the speech selection. For Android phones, download the Android Accessibility Suite by Google LLC, then go to Settings -> Accessibility -> Installed Services, then turn on Select to Speak.

Speech-to-Text

Simply, dictation is defined as translating spoken word into text. While there are specific disability devices that offer this, the latest smartphones are now equipped for dictation. Click here to learn how to use dictation for iPhone. Click here to learn how to use dictation for Android.

Recording

Recording devices have proven as useful aids for individuals with dyslexia. Not only will they be able to reference the class discussion with full detail, but they can also feel at ease now that they can write notes at their own pace. To access the Voice Memos app quickly on iPhone, go to Settings -> Control Center, then click the green plus button to add the shortcut to the Control Center. On Android, the built-in app “Voice Recorder” is located in the App drawer.

Scanning and Reading

Scanning and reading pens are often distributed through disability services. However, many smartphones are now able to do this. With the application Prizmo, you can scan a typed document which will then translate into text. From here, you can use the text-to-speech functions on your smartphone to have it read out loud to you.

Text Display

With an iPhone, you can go to Settings -> Accessibility -> Display & Text, and from here, you can turn on Bold Text. From this same page, you can also go to “Larger Text” and play around with the sizes to fit one that works best for your child. On Androids, you can go to Settings -> Accessibility -> Font Size, and play with the options from here.

Note: Due to the wide range of Android devices, the provided Android settings may be accessed differently depending on the version.

 

The Internet is host to an endless stream of potential sources that can help your child, but it is important to be careful of any potential marketing ploys that are from unverified sources or people without credentials. To help provide your child and yourself with a keen-eye on spotting scams, check out our How to Spot Marketing supplement that is the perfect addition to your free Connected Family Agreement.

 

Thanks to CSUCI intern, Avery Flower for researching assistive technology and dyslexia, and for co-authoring this article.

I’m the mom psychologist who will help you GetKidsInternetSafe.

Onward to More Awesome Parenting,

Tracy S. Bennett, Ph.D.
Mom, Clinical Psychologist, CSUCI Adjunct Faculty
GetKidsInternetSafe

 

Photo Credits

Photo by Andrea Piacquadio from Pexels

Photo by Meru Bi from Pexels

Photo by August de Richelieu from Pexels

Photo by Avery Flower

 

Works Cited

[1] Azorín, E. I., Martin-Lobo, P., Vergara-Moragues, E., & Calvo, A. (2019). Profile and neuropsychological differences in adolescent students with and without dyslexia. Revista Latinoamericana de Psicología, 51(2), 83–92.

[2] DyslexiaHelp at the University of Michigan. (n.d.). Frequently Asked Questions. Retrieved from http://dyslexiahelp.umich.edu/answers/faq

[3] Assistive Technology Industry Association. (n.d.). What is AT? Retrieved from https://www.atia.org/home/at-resources/what-is-at/

[4] Tariq, R., & Latif, S. (2016). A mobile application to improve learning performance of dyslexic children with writing difficulties. Journal of Educational Technology & Society, 19(4), 151–166.

[5] Draffan, E. A., Evans, D. G., & Blenkhorn, P. (2007). Use of assistive technology by students with dyslexia in post-secondary education. Disability and Rehabilitation: Assistive Technology, 2(2), 105–116. https://doi-org.ezproxy.csuci.edu/10.1080/17483100601178492

[6] Lindeblad, E., Nilsson, S., Gustafson, S., & Svensson, I. (2017). Assistive technology as reading interventions for children with reading impairments with a one-year follow-up. Disability and Rehabilitation: Assistive Technology, 12(7), 713–724. https://doi-org.ezproxy.csuci.edu/10.1080/17483107.2016.1253116

 

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