Youtube Facebook Twitter Instagram Linkedin

Need peaceful screen time negotiations?

Get your FREE GKIS Connected Family Screen Agreement

getkidsinternetsafe

Off the Phone and On the Soccer Field: My Cure for Digital Disconnection

by

Kids crave connection. Face-to-face interaction and emotional closeness are vital for healthy development—particularly for adolescents.[1] Screen time offers shallow connections and distracts kids from those unpleasant cravings. It also keeps kids so busy that they don’t seek the connection they so desperately need. What if they didn’t have to be so lonely? What if there was a way they could be off their screens, doing something good for their health, and making friends at the same time?  For me, that was playing sports.

The Seed Was Planted

As a child, I was most excited to hang out with my friends, be on my phone, watch TV, or eat sweets, in that order. That was until I joined a team sport.

It all started when my mother asked me if I wanted to join the local soccer team. I was nine years old and against the idea because I didn’t want it to cut into cartoon time on the weekends, and had we gone through the Screen Safety Essentials Course, we wouldn’t have worried so much about the impact of screens on us. But she insisted. I only agreed because my favorite cousins were on the team.

I learned from the first practice that I loved the intense physical activity of soccer, and after a while, I began to really get the hang of it. I felt proud and accomplished. I made great friends on the team. We loved team bonding activities and even began to hang out outside of practice. I loved it so much, I gave it my all and looked forward to it all week.

By high school, I had won medals and genuinely felt like I was good at the sport. I received praise and encouragement for all of my efforts and hard work. It also inspired me to work hard in other aspects of my life. I tried harder in school, was friendlier with classmates, more obedient in class, and more eager to participate in the learning process. According to Project Play, high school athletes are more likely to further their education and even receive higher grades in college.[2] I started seeing everything in the world as a skill waiting to be attained, something that required courage, effort, and training.

Having that view of the world helped me when I sprained my ankle right before the start of my freshman season. While recovering, I could have easily scrolled through Snapchat and Instagram endlessly. But I wanted to make sure I continued to build the bond with my teammates for when I returned. It taught me to wait my turn, keep a positive attitude, remain patient, and support others as they shine. As soon as I recovered, my teammates were more than happy to catch me up to speed, and I rebuilt my strength.

Core Memories That Last

One of my most memorable moments taught me something I will never forget. It was my junior year; we were tied 0-0, with a minute left in the game. My team was exhausted, but as captain, I knew this is where my job was most important. I dribbled the ball up the center, dodging two midfielders and one defender, set it up for my left forward, and yelled, “SHOOT!” She shot and sent it straight into the upper right corner of the goal. Everyone who was there to support us was on their feet, our coaches were throwing their clipboards in the air and hugging each other, and our teammates ran to us for a celebratory hug and a jump around. We spent the last 15 seconds of that game with tears in our eyes and joy in our hearts. We had just beaten a 40-year record for our school!

This is when I realized this would have a lifelong impact on me. It was one of those moments that I’ll look back on happily. It was a lifetime of preparation to become someone people could rely on when things got tough and hope felt lost. It was the moment I truly understood what being a leader meant to me and the impact it had on others.

I hugged and thanked my mother for signing me up for soccer at nine years old. She introduced me to the first love of my life, and I would forever be grateful for that. From then on, I never doubted my abilities to get something done, never lost confidence in myself, and never hurt someone without apologizing or broke something without trying to replace it.

The Impact of The Beautiful Game

Project Play reports that sports, in particular, can positively impact aspects of personal development among young people, keep them away from harmful substances, and encourage cognitive, educational, and mental health benefits.[2] I believe my experience of playing soccer was so much more than just a fun sport or a way to stay active, although both are tried and true. It was a refinement of my character, it was a positive shift in how I viewed the world and myself in it, it was what taught me that rejection was just redirection, and it was a way to build and maintain connections with people I am still close to, at 27 years old.

Why Everyone Should Play Sports

Participation in sports can protect against the development of mental health disorders.[4] These benefits include lowering stress levels, rates of anxiety and depression.[5]Lifelong participation in sports leads to improved mental health outcomes and even immediate psychological benefits which continue long after participation is over with. The improve self-confidence, encourage creativity, and nurture a higher self-esteem. Statistically, adolescents who play sports are eight times more likely to be physically active at age 24.[3]


Thanks to CSUCI intern, Elaha Qudratulla, for sharing an important story about how beneficial playing sports were for her then and how it still helps her today.

I’m the mom psychologist who will help you GetKidsInternetSafe.

Onward to More Awesome Parenting,

Tracy S. Bennett, Ph.D.
Mom, Clinical Psychologist, CSUCI Adjunct Faculty
GetKidsInternetSafe.com

 

Works Cited:

[1] https://www.uvpediatrics.com/topics/alone-together-how-smartphones-and-social-media-contribute-to-social-deprivation-in-youth

[2] https://projectplay.org/youth-sports/facts/benefits

[3] https://odphp.health.gov/sites/default/files/2020-09/YSS_Report_OnePager_2020-08-31_web.pdf

[4] https://baca.org/blog/does-playing-organized-youth-sports-have-an-impact-on-adult-mental-health/

[5] https://pce.sandiego.edu/child-development-through-sports/

Photos Cited:

[Header] Eva Wahyuni on UnSplash

[2] Olivia Hibbins on UnSplash

[3] Elaha Qudratulla

[4] Jeffrey F Lin on UnSplash

[5] Elaha Qudratulla

https://unsplash.com/

Netflix Documentary, Bad Influencer, Exposes Parent Producer Abusing Child Influencers

by

We were hunters and gatherers for 90% of human existence. That means our brains are still wired to prioritize the things that kept us alive when we were living on the land, before the domestication of animals and the construction of cities. One thing that kept us alive was living in a tribe and cooperating. Attracting a tribe and fitting in was a requirement of life. That is why kids and teens are hyper-focused on doing what their friends do and working to be cool and accepted. Online influencers count on this drive to maintain their income streams. One way to attract kids online is to be a kid doing what kids love to do, playing with toys and video games, opening new packages, and hanging out with friends acting goofy. Netflix’s Bad Influencer offers a glimpse of the kid influencer “scene,” and the lengths that some parents will go to attract and keep a following.

What is Bad Influence about?

The limited documentary series has gone viral for good reason. It’s definitely entertaining, but also deeply unsettling. It is a perfect way to raise awareness about how scary a life all about social media can be. Bad Influencer is a documentary that focuses on a tween who becomes an overnight social media star and brings her friends to stardom with her. What started out as a fun hobby quickly turned into a living nightmare. It may seem glamorous to be famous online, until you learn that the child influencers spent the majority of their childhoods working long hours acting out video ideas, risky stunts, and performing pranks that sometimes went too far—all under the pressure of adult producers/parents hungry for views. Check out Intimacy With Minors Encouraged at the Hype House for a similar story of underage exploitation.

SPOILER ALERT: The show takes a chilling turn when the mother of the main character is accused of, and videotaped, sexually exploiting these kids on set by positioning herself as one of the only adults supervising them to control them. Some survived the battle with only a few scars, while the main character is stuck living this nightmare over and over again. It may be funny, exaggerated, and attention-grabbing, but it also paints a dark picture of a digital world where clout matters more than character and children are left to pay the price.

Psychology Behind the Fame Obsession

From a psychological point of view, being an influencer is cool to children because they have a natural need for validation, attention, and social connection.[1] Although the minimum age on most social media platforms is 13, it is reported that children ranging from 8-17 are found scrolling through online platforms soaking up content too mature for their ages.[2] Sadly, unlike real-world relationships, social media platforms offer fast, unfiltered dopamine hits through likes, shares, and views. Without proper guidance, this can make kids tie their self-worth to online numbers, which can result in low self-esteem, fear of missing out (FOMO), performance anxiety, and digital addiction.[3] As a result of social unlimited social media usage, kids can also experience anxiety, depression, and even poor quality of sleep.[4] Counteract this monster and help your child build emotional resilience, red flag awareness, and digital literacy by taking our GKIS Social Media Readiness Training Course. Geared for teens or tweens, it’s the perfect giftbefore that new device or video game.

What You Can Do to Help

Bad Influencer is not just a show; it’s a cautionary tale that shares the pressures kids face online every day. It is easy to get off topic and want to pull the plug on all electronics just to protect your child from their dangers, but that is not always possible. Technology and online platforms are all around us, and it is better to set your child up for success than to try to keep them out of the loop. Connecting with your child over what they find interesting can help create a trusting relationship where you can notice if things start to become a little off. Our free Connected Family Screen Agreement can help you and your child co-create rules around how to safely navigate online platforms. This way your child can thrive in the digital age without losing themselves in it.

 

Thanks to CSUCI intern, Elaha Qudratulla for researching and co-writing this article.

I’m the mom psychologist who will help you GetKidsInternetSafe. Onward to More Awesome Parenting,

Tracy S. Bennett, Ph.D.
Mom, Clinical Psychologist, CSUCI Adjunct Faculty
GetKidsInternetSafe.com

Works Cited

[1] https://genomind.com/patients/the-social-media-dilemma-how-childrens-mental-health-may-be-affected/
[2] https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/37721985/
[3] https://startmywellness.com/2025/02/how-social-media-affects-mental-health/
[4] https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC11641642/

Photo Credits

[Header] freestock on Unsplash
[2] Leonardo David on Unsplash
[3] Sanket Mishra on Unsplash
[4] Cande Westh on Unsplash
https://unsplash.com/

Schools are Banning Child Smartphone Use During School

by

September 23rd, Governor Gavin Newsom signed the Phone-Free School Act (Assembly Bill 3216). This requires every school district, charter school, and county office of education in California to adopt a policy limiting or prohibiting child smartphone use in school by July 1, 2026. Authored by Assemblymembers Josh Hoover, David Alvarez, Josh Lowenthal, and Al Muratsuchi, this bipartisan legislation is intended to reduce the digital injuries resulting from in-school smartphone use, including harm to academic and social success and overall mental health.

California is not alone. As of October 3, 2024, eight states, including California, Florida, Indiana, Louisiana, Minnesota, Ohio, South Carolina, and Virginia, have passed policies to ban or limit child smartphone use in schools. Many of these policies also call for schools to implement content blocking, social media readiness training, and a digital literacy curriculum that specifically addresses issues like spreading misinformation. Most also allow for exceptions due to emergency, medical, or educational necessity (e.g., learning accommodations) or with teacher permission.

Bipartisan Support & Health Advisory Recommendations

Screen safety policies have received widespread bipartisan support, with the Biden-Harris administration continuing to promote child online safety. The U.S. Surgeon General has also been outspoken in response to America’s youth mental crisis, illustrated by the CDC’s 2023 Youth Risk Behavior Survey. UNESCO has called for limits on cellphone use in schools globally, and the American Psychological Association released a health advisory on social media use in adolescence in April of 2023 with specific recommendations based on the psychological evidence.

What Schools Are Saying About Their Initial Efforts

Many California schools are already embracing change by adopting smartphone-free classrooms. For example, Nordhoff Junior High and High School recently invited Dr. Tracy Bennett, Psychologist, Screen Safety Expert, and Founder of GetKidsInternetSafe, to speak to their students in preparation for these changes. We interviewed Beth Burke,  LCSW Mental Health Clinician/Clinical Supervisor at Nordhoff about their experience implementing the new policy.

What was your final policy?

7th and 8th graders are not allowed smartphones at any time, even during lunch and breaks. Cell phone hotels hold phones during class and in backpacks outside of class. Use is only allowed for pickups and in case of emergency.

9th through 12th graders put their phones in a cell phone hotel during class. This is a big change. They can have them out during snack time and lunch.

There’s some discipline on the junior high level here and there. We have a first through fourth offence system. 1) take it away, 2) take away and parent contact and lose citizenship points. 3) has to be picked up by the parent. 4) need a behavior contract.

What factors led you to this policy?

Our teachers approached the administration for help with the cell phone use in and out of class. Research is also showing more and more that smartphones are very distracting. We read about other schools doing this and how it was doing well. As a faculty, we discussed the policy specifics and gained consensus that we wanted to implement this schoolwide. Last year was our first year with 7th and 8th graders on campus, and it was even more distracting for them. Parents in the community were glad about it. When it was announced at the parent orientation there were cheers.

What preparations did you make?

Our principal sent out parent square messaging during the summer citing some research so they could get ahead of it.

What opposition did you face?

A few parents expressed concern about emergencies. They were afraid in case of mass shootings. One or two students with IEPs due to anxiety wanted to keep their phones to text when they became anxious. We offered to let them keep it in their backpack because they will need it if they leave the classroom. That was in line with the policy so that was ok.

What are your first impressions?

I want to do a survey. Anecdotally, the kids are saying that they’re feeling less distracted and like being able to focus. I’m not hearing a lot of negatives, especially for the 7th and 8th graders. They all want to be the same. An overall policy is like a school uniform. It works! They don’t want to be the one and only kid calling mom. Teachers like it better. At first, they were like, “Do we have to do one more thing?” But they’re noticing less distraction. There is definitely more positive than negative.

Any tips on how to do this successfully?

It’s gone better than we expected. We expected more parent and student pushback and drama. Having all teachers enforce the policy made it easier since the old policy was not uniformly enforced or supported. But it’s good! It’s good for them to not have that distraction in the classroom and on campus for the 7th and 8thgraders. It can be a true addiction, and the more they can focus on school and interactions with one another the better. School is hopefully one place they can come to focus on learning and interacting with one another face-to-face.

GetKidsInternetSafe Offers Screen Safety Tools for Kids, Families, and Professionals

GetKidsInternetSafe has been advocating for efforts like these since it was founded by Dr. Tracy Bennett in 2014. Our GKIS courses, like the Social Media Readiness Course for tweens and teens and our Screen Safety Essentials Course for families, offer information in line with expert recommendations.

In partnership with Tarzana Treatment Centers, we are also launching our Screen Safety Certification Course. This online course offers 20 continuing education units and helps prepare paraprofessionals and professionals to expertly work with families and youth for better screen safety. Thanks to input from Caitlin McCranie, Honors English Teacher at Oak Park High School, we offer a student survey to GKIS certification students to help them get their youth ready for smartphone-free classrooms.

A special thank you to our hard-working mental health professionals and teachers who are on the front lines fighting for child wellness. We are especially grateful to Beth Burke and Caitlin McCranie for helping us with the information included in this article.

I’m the mom psychologist who will help you GetKidsInternetSafe.

Onward to More Awesome Parenting,

Tracy S. Bennett, Ph.D.
Mom, Clinical Psychologist, CSUCI Adjunct Faculty
GetKidsInternetSafe.com

Works Cited

https://www.apa.org/topics/social-media-internet/health-advisory-adolescent-social-media-use

https://www.cdc.gov/yrbs/results/2023-yrbs-results.html

https://www.flsenate.gov/Session/Bill/2023/379

https://legiscan.com/IN/text/SB0185/id/2935758

https://www.kff.org/mental-health/issue-brief/a-look-at-state-efforts-to-ban-cellphones-in-schools-and-implications-for-youth-mental-health/#:~:text=In%202009%2C%2091%25%20of%20public,with%20excessive%20use%20of%20smartphones.

https://legiscan.com/LA/bill/SB207/2024

Photo Credits

Photo by Tamarcus Brown on Unsplash

The GKIS Sensible Parent’s Guide to BeReal 

by

If you’re a parent, you know how much kids use social media. Apps are everywhere, and they’re becoming more popular. BeReal is a social media app that aims to “spotlight someone who’s living in the moment, going for it, celebrating life and all its weird/wonderful chaotic energy.”[1] Teens and tweens are falling in love with BeReal and its positive message. In this article, we’re covering what you need to know about BeReal. Does it allow harmful content? Are we ready to handle the risks that may come with it? Learning about social media can be tricky, but the GKIS Social Media Readiness Course helps teens and tweens learn the risks of social media and practice good psychological wellness. Read on for more info on this new popular app.

What is BeReal?

BeReal is a French social media app released in 2020 by Alexis Barreyat and Kevin Perreau that allows users to post real-time photos taken from the front and back phone cameras at the same time.[2]

BeReal’s mission is to “create an authentic world that keeps you connected with the people you really care about.”[3] It encourages users to live in the moment and stay away from harmful filters and trends. BeReal currently has over 6 million users a day.[4] It became popular in 2020 when teens on TikTok started posting their BeReals with celebrities and influencers.

How to Use BeReal

BeReal is easy to use. Users receive alerts at random times during the day to take a photo of what they’re doing.

Once alerted, users have two minutes to take their photo and post it. If they post on time, they can take two more BeReals that day. If they post late, they only get one photo op that day.

Although BeReal users can’t upload images from their photo albums, they can react and comment on friends’ photos or save their reaction photos to be re-used on their friends’ future BeReals.

Benefits of Using BeReal

No Filters

BeReal’s main benefit is that its layout forces users to post with no slimming, skin-lightening, or makeup filters. Social media filters have been found to lead to insecurity, depression, and more harmful effects. Check out our GKIS articles “Influencers Hurt Child Self-Esteem by Overusing Filters” and “Beauty Filters Don’t Embrace Brown Beauty: The Rise of Colorism” to learn more about the dangers of filters.

No Likes

On BeReal, there is no “Like” button. Other apps like Instagram, Twitter, and TikTok show the amount of likes someone gets on their post. It’s no secret that most children think how many likes they get contributes to how cool they are. BeReal takes away this feature, making it less of a popularity contest.

Private Accounts

When you make your BeReal account, it automatically makes your profile private. Users must approve friend requests for you to see their posts.

Risks of Using BeReal

Location and Time Sharing

Like any app, there are some risks to using BeReal. BeReal posts include the city in which the user took the photo. It also includes a timestamp of when they took the photo.

Public Photos

Another risk is that you have the option to make your individual BeReals public for friends of friends to see. Friends of friends will not see your account, but an individual BeReal you posted may show up on their feed.

Other Risks

Other risks to using BeReal include:

  • Being or feeling pressured to share
  • Viewing inappropriate content
  • Experiencing unwanted contact
  • Oversharing

Privacy and Safety Options

Account Privacy

BeReal automatically makes your profile private when you sign up. Friendships must be approved by each user, so users can deny anyone access to their profile.

Photo Sharing

You can make an individual BeReal post public or private. To make it private, take a photo and click “My friends only” before posting.

To make it public, take a photo and click “My friends + their friends.” This allows friends of your friends to see your BeReals.

Location Privacy

BeReal shares the location of each photo when posted, but we can fix that. Users can turn off the location feature by taking a photo, clicking on “location,” and then selecting “location off” before posting.

Report and Block Inappropriate Users and Posts

If you see a post you don’t like, click on the three dots in the corner of the photo and click “Report this BeReal.” This means BeReal will no longer show you that post or any other posts from that person.

If you see a lot of inappropriate posts from a user, you can remove them as a friend or block their account. This stops you from seeing their posts and stops them from seeing yours.

GKIS Safety Ideas

Thanks to CSUCI intern Samantha Sanchez for researching BeReal and preparing this article.

I’m the mom psychologist who will help you GetKidsInternetSafe.

Onward to More Awesome Parenting

Tracy S. Bennett, Ph. D.
Mom, Clinical Psychologist, CSUCI Adjunct Faculty
GetKidsInternetSafe.com

Works Cited  

[1] BeReal Realest Person Announcement

[2] BeReal   

[3] BeReal – Our Mission and Values 

[4] BeReal Revenue and Usage Statistics (2023) 

 

Photo Credits

Photo by Ottr Dan (https://unsplash.com/photos/0EFrV9Pgvb8)

Photo by Nathan Dumlao (https://unsplash.com/photos/ItsW7gT8iR0)

Photo by Bruno Gomiero (https://unsplash.com/photos/jp7J14W9sSg) 

Teens Are Using New AI Software “ChatGPT” to Write Their Essays for Them

by

Advancements in artificial intelligence technology have transformed the media we consume. These highly intelligent computer programs can create realistic-looking images from a few words, hold entire conversations, and even write cited essays. While programs like ChatGPT can give us simple answers to our questions, they can also hinder our children’s learning when they outsource their brainwork to an all-knowing robot. If you worry that your child is relying on technology a little too much, our Screen Safety Toolkit offers a resource guide so you can tighten up screen time supervision and management.

What is ChatGPT?

ChatGPT is a language processing tool that is powered by artificial intelligence (AI) technology, allowing you to have human-like conversations.[1] ChatGPT can answer one’s questions and complete various tasks from essays, to editing code, to writing emails. This software is open to the public for free, although there is also a paid subscription version with additional features.[1] Notable celebrities in technology like Elon Musk have commented on the strength of ChatGPT, stating “ChatGPT is scary good. We are not far from dangerously strong AI.”[1]

ChatGPT gets its data from textbooks, websites, and various articles which it simultaneously uses to model its language to seem more human-like.[2] This AI is well-trained on biased and unbiased data and can reproduce data with reliability, something that many other similar AI systems lack.[2]

When asked to write a sentence for this article, ChatGPT responded with, “ChatGPT is an artificial intelligence language model developed by OpenAI, based on the GPT-3 architecture. It is designed to generate natural language responses to a wide variety of prompts and questions. ChatGPT uses advanced machine learning algorithms to understand the nuances of language and generate context-sensitive responses that are often indistinguishable from those written by a human. It has a wide range of potential applications, from customer service and education to creative writing and more.”[3] How’s that for a definition?!

How are kids using ChatGPT to cheat?

While ChatGPT’s design of being able to generate natural responses to various questions and prompts can make it a helpful tool for educational and informational purposes, it also opens it up to exploitation for other purposes. A quick Google search will turn up dozens of articles on how to get ChatGPT to write your essay for you. A student at Cardiff University in Wales shared his experience with turning in two papers, one written by himself and the other written by ChatGPT.[4] The essay from ChatGPT earned him the highest grade he had ever received on an essay in his entire time in undergraduate school.[4]

College professor and TikTok user Lilmaverick3 received an essay from one of her students that had been flagged by TurnItIn.com as being 100% written by AI technology, proving that students have already started taking advantage of the AI’s skills and ability to create human-like speech.[5] The technology is still relatively new but stories just like this will likely continue.

Cheating robs children of the satisfaction of completing their own assignments and the learning experience that comes with research. It also offers a dishonest view of academic ability, which can quickly get out of hand when teachers ratchet up expectations in response.

What Parents and Educators Can Do to Prevent Cheating

  • Research various forms of AI detectors and run your child’s papers through flagging software, this way you can see if the paper has any elements that have been plagiarized.
    • Some popular flagging software includes Writer’s AI Content Detector and Content at Scale’s AI Detector. For educators, we recommend having students turn in assignments through TurnItIn.com, this checks for plagiarism as well as how much of the assignment is AI-generated content.
  • Communicate your expectations surrounding homework and plagiarism from the start using our GKIS Connected Families Screen Agreement.
  • Sit with your child while they work on assignments to offer support as they need it, and be there before they decide to turn to AIs.
  • Manage smart devices during homework time using resources from our GKIS Screen Safety Toolkit.
  • Utilize ChatGPT in ways that allow it to be an educational tool, like writing ideas, creating to-do lists, and finding resources.
    • ChatGPT is a helpful tool for educational purposes when used properly. As a prompt-based language bot, it can be used to spruce up resumes or cover letters based on inputted job description data, help create outlines for papers based on inputted prompt data, and even provide recipes for weekly meals.
    • Promoting ChatGPT as an educational tool rather than a homework robot can prevent your child from creating an unhealthy dependence on AI software to do their work for them.

Like what you read? Check out our GKIS article “Siri and Alexa Help Kids Cheat on Homework”.

Thanks to CSUCI intern, Katherine Carroll for researching ChatGPT.

I’m the mom psychologist who will help you GetKidsInternetSafe.

Onward to More Awesome Parenting,

Tracy S. Bennett, Ph.D.
Mom, Clinical Psychologist, CSUCI Adjunct Faculty
GetKidsInternetSafe.com

Works Cited

[1] Ortiz, S. (2023). What is ChatGPT and why does it matter? Here’s what you need to know. ZDNET. https://www.zdnet.com/article/what-is-chatgpt-and-why-does-it-matter-heres-everything-you-need-to-know/

[2] Pocock, K. (2023). What Is ChatGPT? – what is it used for? PCguide. https://www.pcguide.com/apps/what-is-chat-gpt/

[3] ChatGPT. (2023, May 3). Write a few sentences on what ChatGPT is. Response to user question. Retrieved from https://chat.openai.com/

[4] Wehner, G. (2023). UK college student uses AI to write high-scoring essay, earns high grade: report. Fox Business. https://www.foxbusiness.com/technology/uk-college-student-ai-write-high-scoring-essay-report

[5] LilmaverickProf [@lilmaverick3]. (2023). AI detection now automated for educators #professor #Ai #chatgpt [Video]. TikTok. https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTRwx4R8f/

Photo Credits

Photo by Shantanu Kumar (https://unsplash.com/photos/_CquNNr1744)

Photo by Levart_Photographer (https://unsplash.com/photos/drwpcjkvxuU)

Photo by freestocks (https://unsplash.com/photos/I_pOqP6kCOI)

Photo by sofatutor (https://unsplash.com/photos/4r5Hogjbgkw)

What “Going Viral” Does to Your Brain and Self-Esteem

by

Before the internet, “going viral” was not something positive much less something people actively sought out. “Going viral” has become a new age epidemic, with people doing whatever they can for their 60 seconds of fame. But what does “going viral” actually mean, and how does it affect our brains and our self-esteem? Today’s GKIS article will break down “going viral” and its effects. For help raising your child to be digitally smart, check out our GKIS Screen Safety Essentials Course. This course includes all GKIS parenting courses, agreements, and supplements, ensuring you are well-equipped to fight off digital injury and keep your child safe from harm.

What does it mean to “go viral”?

Going viral means sharing something via social media that spreads quickly to thousands, even millions of people. The term viral video was first used in 2009 to describe the video “David After Dentist.”[1]

One viral video or post can turn people into internet celebrities overnight and garner thousands of followers, resulting in brand deals and monetized content. Once a video goes viral, there is no limit to the number of people it will reach or even what platform they will see the video on. It is very common to see posts shared from one platform to the next, whether it be a TikTok on Twitter or a Tweet going viral on Instagram.

The number of views to be considered going viral also varies from platform to platform. One hundred thousand views on TikTok is pretty successful, whereas even a couple hundred thousand views on YouTube is a relatively low number.[2]

The number of likes is also an important factor. Many videos have a high number of views but a relatively low number of likes. These videos are not considered to be going viral because they are not well-received by the general public.[2] Engagement drives up the virality of the content through shares and comments that stimulate the algorithm to continue placing that content on people’s feeds.[2] Another important factor in going viral is the immediacy of response, meaning that the views, likes, and comments must be received within a few hours to days rather than over several months or years.[2]

How does “going viral” affect our brains?

When your video, post, or other content “goes viral,” you receive likes, comments, reposts, shares, and bookmarks. These response notifications prompt the reward systems in our brains.[3] Many fast notifications results in dopamine release. To keep that feel-good feeling going, we keep checking, acting in a way similar to gambling addictions.[3]

Algorithms also take advantage of a variable-reward system because they are programmed to recognize when to take advantage of our reward system and desire for dopamine.[3] This often results in a stockpile of notifications that get delayed until a good amount of time since the last check has passed or a large amount of engagement has accumulated.

For a personal insight into going viral, I interviewed a college student who had recently experienced the sensation of going viral. They said, “I recently had a video go viral on TikTok. It was a video of the Indie-Rock band Boygenius and one of their members, singer Phoebe Bridgers, singing a verse from their song ‘Cool About It.’ I had taken the video at a concert I had recently attended and decided to post it on TikTok since I was lucky enough to be pretty close to the stage. Over the next few days after I posted it, it got 118k views, 32k likes, and 500 comments, and was saved by more than 4000 people. Once it started picking up traction, I became obsessed with checking my notifications and seeing all the new comments. I would constantly look to see how many views I was at each hour. I even got a like from a TikTok creator who I really enjoy so that was very exciting for me.”

Although going viral is thrilling, notifications can be harmful when they are overly distracting.[4] To compensate for smartphone interruptions, studies have shown that people often work faster, resulting in more stress, frustration, time pressure, and effort.[4] Research has linked daily notifications and their interruptions to depression, anxiety, and even symptoms associated with ADHD.[5]

Our interview also revealed that the euphoria of going viral is short-lived and needs constant “re-upping.” Our subject elaborated, “Once the video started to die down though, I got annoyed by the notifications. They were distracting because they were so far and few in-between and nothing quite as exciting as the start. I got kinda sad that my viral moment was dying down. It made me want to post another video to see if it would get the same kind of attention.”

What does “going viral” do to our self-esteem?

Studies have shown that social media can be both detrimental to our self-esteem and boost it at the same time, but how does going viral change that?

Social media usage can add stress to daily life and encourage people to constantly evaluate and compare themselves to others.[6] When someone goes viral, they open themselves up to being judged by thousands of people, some of whom can be cruel, feeling emboldened by the veil of anonymity. While many would agree that the likes and views one receives on a viral post boosts their self-esteem and makes one feel good about themselves, it also allows for internet trolls to make their way into the comment section to bait others into an argument or provoke an emotional reaction.[7]

One-in-five internet users that have been victims of harassment online reported that it happened in the comment section of a website.[8] Reading negative comments can lessen confidence, reduce self-esteem, and depending on the severity, can even provoke suicidal thoughts.[9]

Our GKIS interviewee unfortunately also had experience with the negative side of going viral. They reported, “Before my video went super viral, I had posted another video that didn’t get as many views but still got a couple thousand views, a few hundred likes, and a good amount of comments. The video was clips of my girlfriend and me in celebration of our second anniversary. For the most part, the comments were really nice, with people calling us cute and being supportive. But after a little while of it being up, it got to the wrong side of TikTok. As a queer couple, we’re used to people being rude or staring at us, but to get negative comments just hurt more for some reason. This was a few months ago, but I still think about the comments from time to time. It honestly made me want to delete the whole video even though it was just a few comments out of a bunch of nice ones.”

How Parents Can Help

  • Understand that what you and your child post has the potential to go viral, even if you don’t want it to.
  • Set the privacy settings on posts to control who gets to see the content you share.
  • Prevent a digital injury to your child’s self-esteem before it occurs with our GKIS Screen Safety Toolkit for parents of kids of all ages.
  • To help facilitate difficult conversations about online content and who should see it, try out our free GKIS Connected Family Screen Agreement.

Like what you read? Check out our GKIS articles “Showcasing Child Talent Online Leads to Exploitation and Scams” and “Influencers Hurt Child Self Esteem by Overusing Filters”.

Thanks to CSUCI intern, Katherine Carroll for researching “going viral” and its effect on the brain and self-esteem.

I’m the mom psychologist who will help you GetKidsInternetSafe.

Onward to More Awesome Parenting,

Tracy S. Bennett, Ph.D.
Mom, Clinical Psychologist, CSUCI Adjunct Faculty
GetKidsInternetSafe.com

Works Cited

[1] Wonderopolis. (2022). What Does It Mean To Go Viral? Wonderopolis. https://www.wonderopolis.org/wonder/what-does-it-mean-to-go-viral

[2] Pigeon Studio. (2022). How many views is viral? What makes a video viral? Pigeon Studio. https://studiopigeon.com/blog/how-many-views-is-viral-what-makes-a-video-viral/

[3] Haynes, T. (2018). Dopamine, Smartphones & You: A battle for your time. Science in the News. https://sitn.hms.harvard.edu/flash/2018/dopamine-smartphones-battle-time/

[4] Pandey, N (2022). Constant Distraction And Stress, App Notifications Affect Minds Negatively: Study. NDTV. https://www.ndtv.com/world-news/constant-distraction-and-stress-app-notifications-affect-minds-negatively-study-3595177#:~:text=According%20to%20a%20study%2C%20these,shown%20to%20damage%20task%20performance.

[5] Glick, M. (2022). Phone Notifications Are Messing With Your Brain. Discover. https://www.discovermagazine.com/technology/phone-notifications-are-messing-with-your-brain

[6] Bergman, M. (2023). Social Media’s Effects on Self-Esteem. Social Media Victims Law Center. https://socialmediavictims.org/mental-health/self-esteem/

[7] Australian Government. (2022). Trolling. eSafety Commissioner. https://www.esafety.gov.au/young-people/trolling#:~:text=Something%20has%20happened-,What%20is%20trolling%3F,believe%2C%20just%20to%20cause%20drama.

[7] Australian Government. (2022). Trolling. eSafety Commissioner. https://www.esafety.gov.au/young-people/trolling#:~:text=Something%20has%20happened-,What%20is%20trolling%3F,believe%2C%20just%20to%20cause%20drama

[8] Aleksandra. (2016). How reading online comments affects us. Social Media Psychology. https://socialmediapsychology.eu/2016/10/05/onlineandsocialmediacomments/

[9] Cuncic, A. (2022). Mental Health Effects of Reading Negative Comments Online. VeryWellMind. https://www.verywellmind.com/mental-health-effects-of-reading-negative-comments-online-5090287#:~:text=If%20you%20end%20up%20reading,and%20after%20reading%20comments%20online

Photo Credits

Photo by Good Faces (https://unsplash.com/photos/Lv2lW5ImegQ)

Photo by Christian Wiediger (https://unsplash.com/photos/NmGzVG5Wsg8)

Photo by Robina Weermeijer (https://unsplash.com/photos/3KGF9R_0oHs)

Photo by Cristina Zaragoza (https://unsplash.com/photos/cMVRsfY8R3Q)

Photo by Levi Perchik (https://unsplash.com/photos/5gHdYqpALTY)

Cart
Checkout - $0.00
  • 0
  • 1