Reddit is a popular social media website with millions of users worldwide and has a controversial reputation due to its content moderation policies. This GKIS Sensible Parent’s Guide will provide what a parent needs to know about Reddit and offer some suggestions to help keep your children safe while using the website. We also recommend checking out the GKIS Social Media Readiness Training Course, which can help you teach your kids how to safely interact with any social media website.
How long has Reddit been around how popular is it?
Reddit is a hybrid internet forum and social news media website where users can post images, videos, and links to other websites, and other users can leave comments on the original post. As of February 2023, it’s the tenth most visited website on the internet with 4.8 billion monthly visits.[1] It was founded in 2005 by Steve Huffman, Alexis Ohanian, and Aaron Swartz as a bulletin board-style website that would act as “the front page of the internet.”[2] In 2006, the website was acquired by the mass media company Condé Nast Publications, also known for magazine and news companies such as Vogue, The New Yorker, and Vanity Fair.[3]
The website is divided into thousands of subreddits that organize posts by topic. Some subreddits cover broad topics, such as r/gaming for anything video game related, while others are more specific like r/minecraft or r/fortnite for those specific games. There are subreddits for news, relationship advice, political discussion, different hobbies, and nearly anything else you might expect to find on the internet. There are many subreddits dedicated to community support, like r/TwoXChromosomes for women’s rights and r/lgbt for LGBT issues.
Posts and comments on Reddit can be given upvotes and downvotes, which are similar to likes on Twitter or Facebook. Recent posts with multiple upvotes will be displayed at the top of the subreddit it was posted in. Posts with multiple downvotes are less likely to appear and will often be tagged as “controversial” by the website’s filter settings.
Getting Started with Reddit
The only thing Reddit requires to create an account is a valid email address. Reddit’s user agreement states that users need to be over the age of 13, but there is no age verification requirement besides a check box agreeing to the terms and conditions during account creation. Reddit has a mobile app that can be downloaded from the Google Play store or Apple App store, and can also be accessed from any web browser.
Benefits and Popular Features of Reddit
Custom Home Page
By default, the home page of Reddit shows the subreddit r/popular, which displays a variety of posts from a list of the most popular subreddits, with some restrictions related to political and adult-oriented subreddits.[4] Reddit users can also sort by r/all, which displays the top results from all subreddits on the website.
Reddit users can subscribe to specific subreddits they like, causing those subreddits to appear on their home page. Users can also subscribe to other user profiles so that they can see what another user posts no matter what subreddit it’s posted in. By doing so they can create a curated feed of content that relates to their interests.
Subreddits are mostly created by Reddit users and act as community forums for discussion and sharing media. They are run by moderators, who are users that set and enforce rules within each subreddit but are not paid employees of Reddit.[5] Reddit employees known as administrators only get involved in a subreddit if there are violations of the website’s terms of service and content policies.[6]
Community Events
Reddit is also known for having large community events on April Fools’ Day every year. In 2015, the subreddit r/thebutton was created, where a sitewide countdown clock could be reset by pushing a button, but each user could only push the button once.[7] In 2017 and 2022, Reddit ran an event called r/place where its community members could collaborate to create pixel artwork on a canvas where each user could only edit a single pixel every five minutes.[8]
Reddit’s Privacy and Safety Options
Reddit’s user settings and account creation process offer several options to protect yourself and your information while you use the website.
Anonymity
Reddit does not require any personal information besides an email address to create an account.
In its Safety & Privacy Settings, you can choose whether you want your profile to appear in search engine results from websites like Google or Bing.
Users can delete their posts, comments, or their entire account from their profile settings at any time.
Personal Information
Reddit collects personal information about its users but allows users to restrict what information is collected and how it is used in its Safety & Privacy Settings.
Reddit users can file a data request form to receive a copy of the data that has been collected from their account.
When an account is deleted, the username is removed from all posts and comments made by that account. However, the posts will still be publicly visible unless they are deleted before the account.
Chat and Private Messages
Users can choose whether they want to receive chat requests and private messages in their Chat Settings and can restrict messages from accounts less than 30 days old.
Users can also block individual user profiles, preventing that user from messaging them or sending chat requests.
Risks of Reddit
Adult-Oriented Content
Reddit has many subreddits dedicated to easily accessible adult content like pornography and graphic violence. Posts from these subreddits are marked as NSFW (internet slang for ‘Not Safe for Work’ or ‘Not Suitable for Workplace’) and excluded from r/popular and r/all.[4] Despite this, directly searching for adult content is only restricted by a check box below the search bar asking if you would like to include NSFW search results. Those results still appear if you select to hide NSFW posts in your user settings.
Additionally, the process for tagging NSFW content is only enforced by moderators, not site administrators. Inappropriate posts that contain nudity are automatically tagged, but ones that do not show explicit nudity can slip through the filtering process. Posts containing graphic violence are also often poorly moderated, and content from subreddits like r/fightporn (videos of street fights) and r/CombatFootage (GoPro videos of military conflicts) often make it to Reddit’s r/all page even if they show severe injuries or death.
Political Content and Hate Speech
Reddit has had many controversies surrounding the political subreddits on its website. In 2015, five popular hate speech subreddits targeting ethnic and gender minorities were banned for violating Reddit’s anti-harassment policies.[9] It banned the subreddit r/altright in 2017 after posts were made which called for the harassment of and leaked the personal information of a man who punched right-wing personality Richard Spencer.[10] Multiple political subreddits such as r/The_Donald, R/DonaldTrump, r/GenderCritical, and r/ChapoTrapHouse were banned under new policies designed to reduce hate speech in 2020.[11]
Despite these efforts, Reddit continues to have problems with hate speech and politically motivated harassment on its platform. While these bans remove the offending subreddits and all posts within them, the users who subscribed and made posts in those subreddits are rarely banned unless they directly violate terms of service. Users from the banned subreddits will often continue posting in other subreddits with similarly relaxed rules about hate speech and discrimination until it is banned as well.
Cyberbullying and Harassment
Reddit is a social media website with a high risk of cyberbullying and harassment. Because Reddit users are anonymous, there are few repercussions for directly sending another user harmful messages or unwanted explicit images. A user’s posts and comments are also publicly visible to all other users, which enables internet stalking behavior. While Reddit does have anti-harassment policies that can result in an offender’s account being banned, there’s little to prevent a banned user from creating another account to continue their harassment.[12]
GKIS Suggestions to Keep Your Kids Safe on Reddit
You can sign up for the GKIS Connect Family Screen Agreement, a free course that covers the basics of internet safety and keeping open communication between you and your kids about their internet use.
You can check out the GKIS Social Media Readiness Training course, which contains 10 lessons to help your teens and tweens get ready to responsibly use social media. It also provides access to the private GKIS Connected Family Facebook group, with tips and feedback from Dr. Bennett and other families who have taken the course.
There’s also the GKIS Screen Safety Toolkit, which is a parent’s guide to setting up parental controls, screen time management, social media & text monitoring, and other technological tools to keep an eye on how your kids use the internet.
Thanks to CSUCI intern Brandon Bishop for researching Reddit and preparing this GKIS Sensible Parent’s Guide.
I’m the mom psychologist who will help you GetKidsInternetSafe.
Discord is an app that allows groups of people to communicate with each other at any time. It has branded itself as being a messaging app built for gamers. If you would like to teach your gamer the brain hacks and marketing ploys built into games, check out our GKIS Screen Safety Essentials Course. This program offers powerful teaching tools through weekly coaching videos designed for parents and the entire family. The Screen Safety Essentials Course encompasses a variety of valuable resources for keeping families informed about the various pitfalls of the digital world in addition to providing tools for fostering open communication and family connectedness.
How long has Discord been around, and how popular is it?
Discord was launched in May of 2015 by Jason Citron and Stanislav Vishnevskiy. In 2020, Discord earned $130 million, with over 100 million active monthly users. Most of the revenue comes from a service called Nitro, which allows users to pay for upgrades to their servers. About 850 million messages are sent every day on Discord.[1]
Getting Started with Discord
Discord requires users to be over the age of 13 before they are allowed to create an account. This is a simple birthdate check and can be easily faked by children under the age of 13. Discord can be downloaded on the App or Google Play stores on mobile or by going to the Discord website and installing the application on a computer. Discord can also be used on any internet browser.
Before letting your child use any sort of messaging app, we recommend our Connected Family Course to help teach your child about the potential dangers of the internet and how to avoid falling victim to them.
Features of Discord
Basics
When a new user opens Discord, they won’t have a lot of options. To get connected with peers, Discord servers have a link that can be sent out that works as an invite. When an individual clicks that link, Discord will open, and they will be prompted to join the server.
In each server, there can be multiple text and voice channels. These different channels can be used to keep larger servers on topic. For example, creating a specific voice channel for gaming is a common occurrence.
Users often have screen names instead of their actual names displayed. This can make it hard to keep track of who you are talking to, especially if other users change their display names frequently.
Nitro
Discord allows users to ‘boost’ a server with Nitro. This gives various benefits to the server and its members, including higher quality audio chat, exclusive and customizable emojis, and higher quality video sharing.
This costs a user $9.99 a month to boost a server. Servers may be boosted by multiple users for improved benefits.
Private Servers vs Public servers
Private servers require users to be approved by a moderator or be given a password to access the server.
Public servers are joinable by anyone.
Many game companies, such as Sims, Call of Duty, Among Us, and Fortnite have public Discord servers for their fans to join.
Private Chats
Discord allows users to individually message others based on their privacy settings. Explicit content can be filtered out at the user’s discretion.
Messages from complete strangers can be prevented completely by changing one’s privacy settings.
Controversies
During its relatively short lifespan, Discord has found itself at the center of several different controversies. Most recently and famously, it was discovered that several members of the 2021 Washington D.C. occupation used Discord to discuss and organize the Capitol Hill incident. Their server was subsequently deleted.[2]
In addition, numerous Discord servers are solely dedicated to the sharing of various types of pornography. Those servers are often easy to find and join, with little age verification required. So long as the user’s account says they are over 18, they are able to join these servers with no issue.
Benefits of Discord
Discord allows individuals to communicate with their friends easily. Discord does not inherently cost anything, so it is appealing to those with a limited budget. It helps the individual feel connected to their friends and gives them a place to chat how and when they desire. If you like a certain game, joining a public discord to talk with similar-minded people can be exciting and fun. There are hundreds, if not thousands, of servers dedicated to discussing video games, movies, books, or even mythology. Discord provides a broad range of groups.
Discord also offers features to protect privacy. Specifically, it provides settings to prevent instances of bullying, spam, or harassment from strangers. Users just need to know to turn them on.
Risks of Discord
Discord presents some apparent risks. The anonymity of users allows for cyberbullying to be very easy to get away with. Children are often targeted by older members of gaming communities. Users may block other users once they feel threatened, but this does little to prevent cyberbullying from happening. It simply prevents it from happening again.
In addition, the ease of access to pornographic content is a big issue. If a child wanted to look up pornography but didn’t want it to show up on their internet history, Discord can provide it discretely. If you are worried about what websites your child is visiting, consider browsing our article on red-light websites.
GKIS rates Discord as a red-light app. This means that children under the age of 18 are not recommended to use this app. We came to this conclusion based almost solely on the ease of access to explicit content. Perhaps with careful parent supervision, it could be considered a yellow-light app. So long as parents are able to monitor what servers their children are in and who they are talking to, Discord has no more risk than texting or Facebook messaging. GKIS encourages parents to talk to their children and make an informed decision on whether or not Discord is appropriate. For help choosing and programming parental controls and management programs, our Screen Safety Toolkit is a comprehensive research guide with GKIS recommendations and special offers and discounts.
Thanks to CSUCI intern Dakota Byrne for researching Among Us and co-authoring this article.
I’m the mom psychologist who will help you GetKidsInternetSafe.
Twitter is a popular social media app that allows users to communicate with their peers through short “tweets” or posts. Many users post whatever is on their mind, what happened to them during the day or to reach out to their friends. Twitter has the potential for cyberbullying, communicating with strangers, sharing fake news, and viewing inappropriate content. This GKIS Sensible Guide provides the information parents need to know to be familiar with Twitter and make informed decisions on when and how to allow their children to use Twitter.
What is Twitter?
Twitter is a social media platform that allows users to communicate with others using short messages. Twitter messages are called “tweets” and may include text, photos, and videos. Many people use Twitter to follow and reach out to others and to post tweets that aim at becoming “viral.”
Many companies like Target, Starbucks, and fast-food restaurants have Twitter accounts and use them to advertise their products and reach customers. Twitter is also useful for customer service and reporting issues to companies. During highly political times, it is not uncommon to see politicians and their followers using Twitter to garner support and attack opposing opinions.
Twitter has produced many popular influencers. Katy Perry and Justin Bieber are the popular influencers for entertainment/celebrity. Elon Musk, inventor of Tesla, and Jack Dorsey, founder of Twitter, are the top influencers in the technology area. There are several other areas with influencers including The Frugal Traveler as a travel influencer, Jamie Oliver as a health influencer, and Atelier Dore as a fashion influencer.[1]
How long has Twitter been around and how popular is it?
Twitter was founded by Jack Dorsey and officially launched in July of 2006. It is based in San Francisco and has over 25 offices around the world. In a statistic published in February 2020, 56.2% of United States Twitter users were male.[2] There is a wide age range of users with the most common ages 25 to 34 and 55 to 64.[3] In 2019, 330 million monthly active users were reported.[4]
How old is old enough for adoption?
According to Twitter’s Terms of Service, a user “must be at least 13 years old to use the Services.” [5] This age is selected for compliance with the U.S.’s Children’s Online Privacy Protection Act (COPPA). However, in Dr. Bennett’s book Screen Time in the Mean Time, she recommends no social media app adoption until at least the second semester of sixth grade, when kids have more social experience for creative problem solving and are no longer transitioning into middle school. (If the seventh grade is a transition year in your community, she recommends waiting until spring semester for the introduction). Because every child has unique strengths and vulnerabilities, parents are well suited to make the best-informed decision for their family.
What is included in the personal profile?
To create a Twitter account, you will need to enter your name, phone number or email, and create a password. The name you enter does not have to be your real name. It can also be a nickname. You will be directed to set a profile photo that will be used as a thumbnail for all your tweets. A cover photo may also be uploaded and will appear at the top of your profile.
A profile also includes your birthday, including the year, and the month and year that you joined Twitter. It also displays the number of people who follow you and the number of people that you follow. The profile also has four tabs that include Tweets, Tweets & replies, Media, and Likes.
Tweets: Shows all tweets the user has posted or retweeted.
Tweets, retweets, & replies: Shows all tweets the user has posted or retweeted and any replies to tweets.
Media: Shows any photos, videos, or gifs the user has tweeted.
Likes: Shows all tweets the user has liked.
When clicking on a stranger’s profile, it will display if they are following you. It will also list everyone that follows them and that you follow. It also gives you an option to follow the user, turn on their notifications, send them a direct message, and mute, block, or report.
What are the privacy options?
When clicking on “Privacy and Safety” in your settings, Twitter gives you several options which include information on protecting your tweets, direct messages, discoverability and contacts, safety, and personalization and data.
Tweets
The Protect your Tweets option allows users to only show their tweets to those that follow them. This also requires users to approve their followers.
The location information option allows users to add their location to each of their tweets. Users also have the ability to delete all location information.
The photo tagging option allows users to block others from tagging them in photos.
Direct Messages
Users are able to block others from messaging them
Users are able to turn on or off their read receipts which notify the sender with the time they read their message.
Discoverability and Contacts
Users are able to allow people to find their accounts using their phone number or email address.
Safety
Users have the option of blocking media that may contain sensitive content
User can also mark the media they tweet as containing sensitive content
Users have the option of muting works or account
Users can block accounts which means they will no longer see the account and the account will no longer see their account
Users can change their notification settings or turn off notifications
Personalization and Data
Through these settings, users can control how Twitter personalizes content and collects and shares certain data
Users can block Twitter from sharing their data with business partners.
What are the risks for use?
Inappropriate Content
It is easy for users to stumble upon potentially inappropriate content for their age and/or fake news. If one user retweets or shares something potentially inappropriate, all their followers will see that post. The best way to prevent your child from viewing inappropriate content on their Twitter feed is to go through their privacy settings and make sure to block inappropriate accounts. Requiring your child to get approval before the following accounts is another way to prevent inappropriate content. Please note, however, that once on Twitter it is impossible to filter out all inappropriate content.
Cyberbullying
Twitter carries a major risk for cyberbullying due to the anonymous nature of the platform. Twitter users may use a fake name and photo in order to remain anonymous and then send harmful messages or leave harmful comments on others’ tweets. The best way to prevent cyberbullying is to have the Twitter profile set on private and only approve people who are known by the user.
Sub tweeting is another common form of cyberbullying that is found on the platform. Sub tweeting means posting a tweet about someone without specifically naming that person. Most subtweets are harmful and are used as a way to attack a person without having an explicit connection to that person. Once again, even with best efforts, it’s impossible to block all cyberbully behaviors once on the Twitter platform.
Communicating with Strangers
Users who have a public profile are able to be contacted by any Twitter user. This means that strangers of any age can message a user and send them text or photos. Predators have the ability to send messages to young users. A private Twitter account is the best way to prevent contact with strangers.
Distractibility & Constant Access
Twitter produces a wide variety of content which makes it easy to keep scrolling for hours. Users often start looking at one tweet which leads to others of similar content. The cycle can go on for hours. Also, consider how comfortable you are having your child’s friends have constant screen access with your child. Social media fills one’s digital inbox constantly, all-the-time.
GetKidsInternetSafe rates Twitter as a yellow-light app due to the easy access to strangers, inappropriate content, and the potential for cyberbullying. Twitter tries to block inappropriate content from being posted, but there are millions of users who post multiple times a day. If you do opt to allow Twitter, be sure and get your child’s username and password and monitor posts.
Thank you to CSUCI intern Makenzie Stancliff for co-authoring this article. For more information on keeping your child safe on social media, check out the Get Kids Internet Safe Screen Safety Toolkit. Be sure to add Twitter on to the free GKIS Connected Family Agreement as a “not yet.”
I’m the mom psychologist who will help you GetKidsInternetSafe.
[1] Meet The Top Twitter Influencers by Topic. (2018, February 20). Retrieved from https://izea.com/2018/02/20/influencers-on-twitter/
[2] Clement, J. (2020, February 18). U.S. Twitter user distribution by gender 2020. Retrieved from https://www.statista.com/statistics/678794/united-states-twitter-gender-distribution/
[3] Clement, J. (2019, August 9). Twitter: U.S. user age distribution 2018. Retrieved from https://www.statista.com/statistics/192703/age-distribution-of-users-on-twitter-in-the-united-states/
[4] Clement, J. (2019, August 14). Twitter: number of active users 2010-2019. Retrieved from https://www.statista.com/statistics/282087/number-of-monthly-active-twitter-users/
[5] Twitter Terms of Service. (n.d.). Retrieved from https://twitter.com/en/tos
Did you know that Instagram has become a popular dating app?[10] As Tinder users transition to Instagram, child profiles may be increasingly viewed in a sexualized way by strangers. Unlike traditional dating apps, Instagram doesn’t have the stringent age restrictions. Find out what you need to know if your kids or teens have Instagram. Haven’t implement social media rules yet? Dr. Bennett’s Connected Family Online Course is a MUST have for families with school-age kids.
Instagram partners with Tinder.
Tinder is a dating app that allows users to peruse the profile of a potential hookup or dating partner. Swipe left if you’re not interested and right you are. Mutual right swipes opens opportunity for private messaging.[7]
Instagram, on the other hand, is a social media profile that allows users to share images and create a profile displaying their posts. Users can upload to their story, which lets others see what they are doing without posting to their profile. Stories disappear within 24 hours. Public profiles can be viewed by anyone, not just friends; while users must send a friend request before gaining access to posts on private accounts. Other features include direct messaging and live streaming.
In 2015, Instagram partnered with Tinder in response to users increasingly recognizing its advantages for dating and sex, providing more communication features and access to a larger user population.[20]Linking the two social media platforms allows other Tinder users to view your most recent Instagram posts.[9][11]
Previously Tinder accounts provided only basic information (first name, employment, education level, and bio), only allowing you access to other profiles when both users have swiped right.[13] In contrast, on Instagram users can choose what and how much they share about themselves on their profile, allowing all users to view your profile, unless the account is private.
Tinder profiles now include:
user’s location
multiple photos
city
gender
age (optional)
connection to Instagram profile (optional)
top Spotify artists (optional)
boomerangs (optional)
Tinder Gold (in-app purchase)
Are teens using dating apps?
60% of dating app users are between the ages of 18-24.[32]
The largest demographic on Instagram is males between 18-24 years old.[33]
US college students are turning to dating apps when bored or in need of a confidence boost.[2]
By the year 2040, an estimated 70% of coupleswill meet online.[3]
Dating App Fatigue
Why not just stick with Tinder? Experts posit that the change may be in response to dating app fatigue.[2] Studies have found that 32.9% of Tinder users delete the app within a day of downloading it.[3] Also, other dating apps do not provide the same amount of discretion and mystery as Instagram dating. Instagram allows its users to look for a romantic partner without everyone knowing they are on the market.[8]
Instagram Features that Facilitate Dating
Instagram is one of the main sources of social interactions for young people due to the following intuitive and useful features:
Stories feature (disappear in 24 hours):
Allows users to know who views their stories daily[2]
Remarkably low-risk ability to engage with a stranger or someone you’ve previously met in a seemingly spontaneous way (manner)[3]
Allows control over who can view your stories[4]
Offers a place to engage in a new form of casual stalking[6]
Direct Message (DM):
Messages come from people that the user knows, not a stranger.[6]
Provides a false sense of security, especially for kids
Profile:
The shift from viewing only those who have swiped right to seeing all profiles that are not private, provides users with a larger pool of dating options.
Explore Tab:
Caters to what you are used to seeing by showing users similar profiles to the ones they are viewing regularly.
Makes it easier for strangers to approach strangers.
Pops up random profiles that you would be interested in but may not have found on your own.
Gives people the opportunity to approach others that wouldn’t have had the opportunity to on other less popular dating apps.
Tindstagramming
“Sliding into someone’s DM” is the result of Instagram becoming a combo social media/dating app.[6]This refers to reaching out through someone’s direct message when romantically interested. DMs allow the user to hide behind their carefully crafted virtual identity.[9]
Engaging in tindstagramming is becoming more popular. Once-refused users on Tinder now have another shot at potentials on Instagram.[6]Some Tindstagrammers ignore the consensual component that comes with dating in real life.[7]This annoying trend was made easier when the two platforms partnered.
InstaDating
If you like someone, why bother with the complications of real-life flirting? Simply pressing a “like” button on Instagram is equivalent to giving someone a compliment. But it gets pretty subtle. For instance, if you “like” multiple photos it tells that person you are interested in more than friendship. Want to walk up to someone you think is cute and say hello? Now all you have to do is post a comment. The biggest telltale factor of dating on Instagram is when you start DMing. This is where the real flirting starts, and you know that the person is trying to make a move.[4]
Instagram is now our very own advertisement for our dating life.[4] The problem lies in the curation of our personalities online. If we form a connection with someone, they will only know the parts of us that we have shared (or falsely fabricated). So many features, so many options for your perfected virtual identity.
Statistics reveal that tinstagramming is catching on. A 2018 survey of men ages 18-35 found:
14% claimed to use the site to find dates
30% said they use photos from the site to masturbate
7% have paid for nude photos/videos on Instagram
5% have paid for sex on Instagram[20]
Hashtags are used to let others know you are looking to date:
#hookup
#sex
#davido
#chefchi
#lagos[30]
Instagram Dating Lingo
I have found it shockingly common for people to admit they met their partner on Instagram. Now that Instagram is so highly associated with dating, terms have been coined to describe different things couples do.
Here are new terms every parent should know:
Thirst Traps: A thirst trapis either a seductive video or image that’s posted to draw attention from people and receive approval.[4] When dating online, this could be the equivalent of dressing very promiscuously and going out to dance.
Sub-gramming (subgram):Subgrammingoccurs when someone posts photos on their profile that they have talked about with the person they are dating. They have not experienced it together, but it is in some way personal to them.[29]
Twinstagramming:Twinstagframmingis when both people in a relationship post the same (or practically identical) images. This allows others to insinuate that the two are dating.[29]
Orbiting: Orbitingis in a sense the opposite of ghosting. It takes place when, even after communication has ceased, someone continues to watch your stories daily. This is done when someone is still somewhat interested and wants to keep you as an option. However, they choose not to pursue you.[26]
Changes Seen in Real Life Dating
The social acceptance of online dating is a far cry from the negative stigma that used to be associated with it. Flirting also has less pressure associated with it. If you get rejected or ignored, simply try again. So many profiles to choose from…
Since 2017, posting a photo and becoming “Instagram official” has become a common practice for monogamous relationships.[29] Our children’s idea of chivalry is turning into whether their significant other watches their Instagram stories.[24]
It is also changing the way people show their affection in relationships. Users know their relationship is ill-fated when their companion stops viewing their stories.[24]
What to Teach our Kids
A new potential problem with Instagram becoming a dating site is the risk of more sexualized content and predatory people kids may encounter. If your child is at an age that you think dating is appropriate, there is more to teach them than there has been in the past. It’s better to have you teach your children these things than have them turn to outside sources for possibly misguided information.
What you can do:
Establish with your child what it looks like when someone cares for you.Make sure they have a firm grasp on reality. Explain to them how they should be treated in a relationship.
Help them create and maintain confidence and feelings of self-worth.Help them by facilitating engagement in tasks that are creative and fuel the soul.
Offer healthy off-screen hobbies when boredom strikes
Remind them you’re there.Avoid soul-killing lectures. Instead engage in fun, mutual conversations and encourage mutual story-telling. Challenge them to form their own opinions and encourage assertiveness. If they speak up to you, they’re more likely to speak up to dangerous others. Most of all, never let them forget that your love for them is unconditional.
How to Keep Your Child Safe on Instagram
Set account to private.
Use two-factor authentication. This offers more security upon login by requiring a password and your mobile device to access.[16]
No last name, identifying information or sexualized photos.
Control who views posts. Block anyone that you do not want to see your child’s posts (additional precaution to a private account).
Turn off location settings.[15]
Require that your child only friends people they know.
Report anything that makes you feel that your child’s safety is at risk.
Check your child’s account regularly. Remember, kids commonly have more than one Instagram profile (public, private, and finstagram).
Onward to More Awesome Parenting,
Tracy S. Bennett, Ph.D.
Mom, Clinical Psychologist, CSUCI Adjunct Faculty
Works Cited
[10] NZ Herald. “Lee Suckling: Why Instagram is the new Tinder” Lee Suckling, 2018.
[20] Mirror Techology. “Insta-bang? One in 20 men has PAID for sex on Instagram, survey reveals.” Shivali Best, 2018.
[3] Google. “Instagram is the only dating app we’re all using.” Dane Maximov, 2018.
[2] The Future Laboratory. “With real-life encounters still considered an unreliable means to instigate romance, Instagram makes sense as a more practical tool for match-making.” Holly Friend, 2018.
[32] Recode “Tinder and Instagram are ‘crippling’ relationships, sex therapist.” Eric Johnson, 2018.
[33] Google. “47 Incredible Instagram Statistics.” Kit Smith, 2019.
[6] Mashable. “Sliding into Instagram DMs is the new way of digitally flirting,” Rachel Thompson, 2017.
[7] Independent. “‘Tindstagramming’ is a new dating trend – and it needs to stop.” Olivia Petter, 2017.
[9] New York. “The Scourge of the Tindstagrammer: Tinder Rejects Who Creep on Instagram.” Paris Martineau, 2017.
[13] Refinery 29. “Tindstagramming Is The Creepy New Dating Trend You Need To Know.” Natalie Gil, 2017.
[11] VIDA Select. “How To Link And Disconnect Tinder From Instagram”
[8] Digital Trends. “First comes Instagram, then comes love: Why Instagram is displacing dating apps.” Molly McHugh, 2013.
[4] The New York Times. “Instagram Is Now a Dating Platform, Too. Here’s How It Works.” Valeriya Safronova, 2017.
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[26] HuffPost. “I Gave Up Dating Apps And Caught The Man Of My Dreams In A Thirst Trap On Instagram” Emily McCombs, 2018.
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[15] Mothers Circle. “5 Instagram Safety Tips for Teens.” Ali DeCesare, 2013.
