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Pornography Blocking Sites and a Firsthand Account of Pornography Addiction

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It’s no secret that porn has taken over the virtual world. But many aren’t aware that their tweens and teens are at risk for porn addiction. Today we’re looking at a candid first-hand account of someone whose porn addiction started at the age of 12. We’re also taking a glimpse at porn-blocking sites and our tips for recovery. If you’d like to find out what it takes to protect your kid from the dangers of the net and learn info on parental controls and monitoring, check out our GKIS Screen Safety Toolkit. 

The Dangers of Porn 

As mentioned in our article Online Pornography’s Impact on Kids and Teens, pornography consumption has grown. With adult sites like Pornhub growing more popular, our youth are at risk of developing a porn addiction more than ever.  

According to Dr. Bennett, the demographic most at risk for porn addiction is adolescents with troubled familial relations.[1] For years, the common stereotype was that mainly boys were at risk for porn addiction. But times have changed. Girls are just as present on the internet, meaning all our youth are at risk for developing a porn addiction. 

In the Online Pornography’s Impact on Kids and Teens article, Dr. B goes over the effects of regular pornography consumption, which could include the following: 

  • Earlier sexual intercourse 
  • Normalization of violence against women 
  • Sexual aggression 
  • Desensitization and habituation (this means the user may get used to less extreme content and will have to view more extreme content to get the same feeling of satisfaction.) 
  • Hypersexual Disorder, is a disorder that causes one to engage in or think about sex to the point that it affects their life.[2]

For a deeper dive into porn addiction and how it can affect your child, check out Dr. B’s book, Screen Time in the Meantime: A Parenting Guide to Getting Kids Internet Safe. 

A Firsthand Account of Pornography Addiction

Chase is a former pornography addict. He opened up and gave us insight into what it’s like being addicted and how it affected his mental health.

“When I was addicted to pornography, I think I was about 12 or 13 years old. It lasted until I turned 23 and it was a daily occurrence. I was consuming porn in different forms around 3 to 4 times a day,” he said. 

Chase claimed that he got used to consuming porn quickly and talked about how it became a demanding habit. “It felt very infectious to my lifestyle. I’d pick up the phone and have to indulge in porn. Done doing a specific activity? Browsing [porn] again. It felt like if I didn’t get as much satisfaction from a ‘session,’ the next session had to fit a specific theme or fetish.”  

Chase discussed how his porn addiction started creeping into other places in his life, saying “It got so bad to the point where it infected other things that aren’t even related to it in the first place. Looking up specific people, fetishes, and at its worst, trying to find easier avenues or different ways to access content. It was bad.” 

He got even more candid with us, explaining how the addiction became mentally and physically invasive. “I think it affected my mental state very much. I don’t have too much experience in mental challenges when it comes to myself anyway, but it impacted my ability to follow daily habits and schedules, and at its worst, caused me to cancel plans.”

When asked about his advice for addiction prevention advice for those suffering from porn addiction, he replied “It’d be to not create any accounts for anything porn related. Limit yourself slowly over time, and don’t let yourself lose sight of what the future version you have of yourself would do, and slowly become that. You aren’t alone and reach out for help if you need it.” 

Shame and How It Prevents Recovery 

Because of the taboo nature of pornography, many people battling porn addictions experience feelings of shame and guilt. It’s why most people keep their addiction hidden for so long before seeking help. Some experience shame so much that they never seek help. 

We see shame as a huge problem. In a study titled “Hidden in shame: Heterosexual men’s experiences of self-perceived problematic pornography use,”15 men were interviewed about their experience with porn. Nearly all of them stated that they grew up never talking or learning about sex education with their parents. They also stated that viewing pornography is taboo and it was difficult for them to seek help due to fear of rejection.[3] 

One participant even sought help through a doctor when they were experiencing a reduced libido that stemmed from porn addiction. The doctor not only had nothing to offer him, but he immediately referred him to a male fertility specialist for testosterone treatments that cost him hundreds of dollars.[4]  

Porn Site Blockers

Of course, it’s best to not even visit porn sites in the first place. But if you worry you have a problem, here are some porn-blocking tools that may help. 

Disclaimer: GKIS is not sponsored or partnered with any of the porn-blocking sites listed.

Canopy

Canopy is an app that blocks porn sites, blocks apps, schedules screen time and downtime, and sexting prevention through image and text detection.[5] Parents or spouses set up their host account on their device followed by the kid/main user account on the kid/user’s device. The parent or spouse oversees the control settings and monitors the other device.  

FamiSafe 

FamiSafe is another app that blocks porn websites on any device. Like Canopy, parents have access to controls and internet usage. Parents can track social media usage, set screen time limits, track location, monitor keywords searched or sent via text, and more. Parents are notified when their kids are texting about inappropriate topics or when they’re at a location they shouldn’t be.[6]

CovenantEyes and the Victory App

CovenantEyes is a porn detector and blocker. It’s paired with its companion tool, the Victory app, to scan for suspicious activity, send reminders and check-ins, and issue mini-courses to see your progress.[7] CovenantEyes also offers Christian resources for followers struggling with porn addiction. 

GKIS Tips for the Road to Recovery

Porn-blocking sites are useful but not foolproof. So, GKIS has tips for parents of children suffering from porn addiction.  

  • It is healthy and appropriate for children to be curious about the human body and sexuality. For tips about how to offer shame-free sex education, check out our 4-article series starting with 6 Parenting Tips for Making Sex Ed Easier! 
  • In addition to using home-setup strategies detailed in our Connected Family Course and parental monitoring tools listed in our Screen Safety Toolkit, consistently spot-check your child’s screen device. Talking to your child about spot-checking may steer them away from adult content since they know their device may be checked anytime.  
  • Let them know this is the family policy before you buy them screen devices. That way they won’t feel lied to, betrayed, or spied upon if you do find questionable content. And if you do find something, allow that to be a teaching opportunity rather than a punishing opportunity. Your best safety tool is a healthy, collaborative parent-child relationship. 
  • Limiting time on specific apps may be a useful tool for recovery. Apps like Instagram, Twitter, and Reddit are some of the most popular apps for adult film stars to promote their content. (Most smartphones report the time used on each app in ‘Settings.’) 
  • A reward system for good progress may be of good use for porn addiction recovery. Although it may seem like an old-fashioned method, rewarding good behavior has been researched and proven to be effective. Whether it’s a new book, dinner at their favorite restaurant, or a trip to the movies, rewards (with verbal affirmations) can give your child the motivation to stay on the path to recovery. 
  • If you are considering allowing social media apps for your tween or teen, our Social Media Readiness Course offers information about the risks of digital injury and helpful psychological wellness tools as well! 

Battling pornography addiction is hard for anyone, let alone our youth. Whether you have a teen or tween battling addiction or simply want to help them surf the internet safely, GKIS has multiple resources to help you get there. Whether you’re utilizing our Screen Safety Toolkit or simply giving our sex ed articles a read, GKIS is here to make it a smoother journey for you. 

A special thanks to Chase for sharing his story. 

Thanks to CSUCI intern Samantha Sanchez for preparing this article and researching porn addiction.

I’m the mom psychologist who will help you GetKidsInternetSafe.
Onward to More Awesome Parenting

Dr. Tracy S. Bennett, Ph.D. 

Mom, Clinical Psychologist, CSUCI Adjunct Faculty 

GetKidsInternetSafe.com 

Works Cited 

[1] Online Pornography’s Impact on Kids and Teens (https://getkidsinternetsafe.com/porn/)

[2] Screentime in the Meantime: A Parenting Guide to Get Kids and Teens Internet Safe (https://getkidsinternetsafe.com/parenting-guide/) 

[3] Sniewski, L., & Farvid, P. (2020). Hidden in shame: Heterosexual men’s experiences of self-perceived problematic pornography use. Psychology of Men & Masculinities, 21(2), 201–212. https://doi-org.ezproxy.csuci.edu/10.1037/men0000232  

[4] Ibid. 

[5] Canopy (https://canopy.us/2023/02/16/best-porn-blocker/) 

[6] FamiSafe (https://canopy.us/2023/02/16/best-porn-blocker/) 

[7] CovenantEyes (https://www.covenanteyes.com/how-it-works/)   

Photo Credits 

Charlesdeluvio via Unsplash (https://unsplash.com/photos/hand-mannequin-holding-green-cactus-plant-RoB4hHjW_fc)

Franco Alva via Unsplash (https://unsplash.com/photos/man-in-black-t-shirt-using-black-laptop-computer-aqFzxyC3rf8) 

Annie Spratt via Unsplash (https://unsplash.com/photos/man-in-black-t-shirt-lying-on-couch-rmKkZqnVtk4)  

Parents of Student Athletes Struggle to Cope with Critical Tweets

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If you are a parent reading this, you understand how much we care about our children. Thirty-seven percent of kids have been a victim of cyberbullying, and 30% have reported cyberbullying to be an ongoing situation.[1] When we think of cyberbullying, we think of one teenager making online comments about another teen. But imagine a situation where your young adult child is repeatedly having to endure nasty remarks from other adults like it is in the case of college athletes. Some argue that is part of the fame. But is it also part of childhood? We don’t think so at GKIS. For that reason, we created our Social Media Readiness Course for tweens and teens to help your kids recognize the signs of online abuse and how to avoid it. Today’s GKIS article covers what parents of college athletes may encounter on Twitter as well as how to counterbalance the negativity.

Social Media in the Lives of College Athletes

In our GKIS article “When Young Athletes Look to Twitter to Showcase Talent and Track Sports News: An Inside Look,” we discussed the role social media plays in a young athlete’s life and how they learn to cope with it.
Our interviewee John said he learned how to detox from social media on occasion and also how to use cyberbullying as motivation. But when you’re a parent and hear something being said negatively toward your child, even if your child is an adult, it’s hard not to take that personally. There’s no protection from it, and if you jump to their aid online, it might ultimately harm them. College and professional teams don’t want to deal with online drama coming from parents. But sometimes, enough is enough…or is it?

When Parents Can’t Take the Online Attacks Anymore

Randi Mahomes, the mother of Super Bowl champion Patrick Mahomes, took to Twitter in 2021 to express her displeasure at a hit her son took from an opposing player. Arguably, she is in a reasonable position to speak her mind whether we agree with it or not because her son is already playing at the highest level.

But our division one college football player John’s parents weren’t so lucky. If someone was displeased with how John played a game and tweeted, “I hope your dog eats chocolate and gets really sick and throws up on your socks.”[2] (a tweet 7-time Superbowl champion Tom Brady once got), John’s parents must idly stand by and watch people sling mud at their child.

John’s mother Mary recalls, “The hardest one was seeing a tweet saying John was a ‘piece of shit’ after he had a bad game. Most of the time, I would listen to John and let it be, but I couldn’t with that comment. I had to speak my mind and tweet back.” She elaborated, “A few Twitter exchanges went back and forth, and then I let it go after speaking my mind.”

Mary said that some situations were more complicated than others, and she recalls many days being in tears over Twitter comments. She said a particularly hard day was when they read on Twitter that the college John had decided to go with unexpectedly selected a different quarterback. The tweet went out before John ever got a personal call saying the spot that he was offered was no longer available. It was heartbreaking, considering that he had turned down other offers in favor of this one, some of those offers were no longer available. After many conversations with the college scout prior to the tweet that seemed like a guarantee is followed with silence, it was hurtful.

Mary said, “About 80% of the time, the tweets were very positive. John had a good record, so it was more good than bad.” She said she still uses Twitter because she has other interests in the app, not just sports. Her husband, however, has since deleted the app now that their son is done with his athletic college career.

Parents are proud of their children and love to hear positive things. They don’t want to read tweets from strangers saying how their child isn’t trying hard enough or how they lost the big game for the team. Parents see firsthand how much their child loves the game, how hard they work, and how much sacrifice they give up competing at a top level. Because online education starts with parents, we created our Screen Safety Essentials Course for parents and families. Knowing what troubles lurk online will help parents teach their kids what they need to know to avoid digital injury and problem-solve through difficult online situations.

Other Ideas for How to Work Around Unwanted Negativity

  • Take regular breaks from social media. Our GKIS article, Start Fall Fresh With a Cleansing Digital Detox is a great article to help you take that first step.
  • Keep a positive dialogue going with your child about the pressures that arise from being an athlete with anonymous fans.
  • Adopt our free Connected Family Agreement, a simple tool that sets reasonable online limits and feeds a cooperative family alliance when it comes to online decisions.
  • Filter and manage online content with our Screen Safety Toolkit. This resource guide helps you build a customized set of parental controls for filtering and monitoring online content.
  • Set designated times throughout the week when everyone spends time together without their devices. Share about your offline and online lives to stay connected.

Thanks to C SUCI intern Keith Ferries for doing the research and writing this article.

I’m the mom psychologist who will help you GetKidsInternetSafe.

Onward to More Awesome Parenting,

Tracy S. Bennett, Ph.D.
Mom, Clinical Psychologist, CSUCI Adjunct Faculty
GetKidsInternetSafe.com

*Mary is a fictional name to maintain anonymity.

Works Cited

[1] Patchin, J. W., Ph.D. (2019, July 9). 2019 Cyberbullying Data. https://cyberbullying.org/2019-cyberbullying-data

[2] Kimble, L. (2021, February 5). Tom Brady Reads Mean Tweets About Himself Ahead of Super Bowl 2021. People.com. https://people.com/sports/super-bowl-2021-tom-brady-reads-mean-tweets/

Photo Credits

[1] Photographer Unknown https://www.pexels.com/photo/white-ceramic-teacup-beside-black-iphone-5-on-brown-wooden-table-58639/

[2] Karolina Grabowska
https://www.pexels.com/photo/a-woman-with-a-coffee-cup-in-front-of-a-laptop-7320744/

[3] Nicola Barts
https://www.pexels.com/photo/stressed-beard-black-man-working-on-laptop-7925881/

Teens Are Using New AI Software “ChatGPT” to Write Their Essays for Them

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Advancements in artificial intelligence technology have transformed the media we consume. These highly intelligent computer programs can create realistic-looking images from a few words, hold entire conversations, and even write cited essays. While programs like ChatGPT can give us simple answers to our questions, they can also hinder our children’s learning when they outsource their brainwork to an all-knowing robot. If you worry that your child is relying on technology a little too much, our Screen Safety Toolkit offers a resource guide so you can tighten up screen time supervision and management.

What is ChatGPT?

ChatGPT is a language processing tool that is powered by artificial intelligence (AI) technology, allowing you to have human-like conversations.[1] ChatGPT can answer one’s questions and complete various tasks from essays, to editing code, to writing emails. This software is open to the public for free, although there is also a paid subscription version with additional features.[1] Notable celebrities in technology like Elon Musk have commented on the strength of ChatGPT, stating “ChatGPT is scary good. We are not far from dangerously strong AI.”[1]

ChatGPT gets its data from textbooks, websites, and various articles which it simultaneously uses to model its language to seem more human-like.[2] This AI is well-trained on biased and unbiased data and can reproduce data with reliability, something that many other similar AI systems lack.[2]

When asked to write a sentence for this article, ChatGPT responded with, “ChatGPT is an artificial intelligence language model developed by OpenAI, based on the GPT-3 architecture. It is designed to generate natural language responses to a wide variety of prompts and questions. ChatGPT uses advanced machine learning algorithms to understand the nuances of language and generate context-sensitive responses that are often indistinguishable from those written by a human. It has a wide range of potential applications, from customer service and education to creative writing and more.”[3] How’s that for a definition?!

How are kids using ChatGPT to cheat?

While ChatGPT’s design of being able to generate natural responses to various questions and prompts can make it a helpful tool for educational and informational purposes, it also opens it up to exploitation for other purposes. A quick Google search will turn up dozens of articles on how to get ChatGPT to write your essay for you. A student at Cardiff University in Wales shared his experience with turning in two papers, one written by himself and the other written by ChatGPT.[4] The essay from ChatGPT earned him the highest grade he had ever received on an essay in his entire time in undergraduate school.[4]

College professor and TikTok user Lilmaverick3 received an essay from one of her students that had been flagged by TurnItIn.com as being 100% written by AI technology, proving that students have already started taking advantage of the AI’s skills and ability to create human-like speech.[5] The technology is still relatively new but stories just like this will likely continue.

Cheating robs children of the satisfaction of completing their own assignments and the learning experience that comes with research. It also offers a dishonest view of academic ability, which can quickly get out of hand when teachers ratchet up expectations in response.

What Parents and Educators Can Do to Prevent Cheating

  • Research various forms of AI detectors and run your child’s papers through flagging software, this way you can see if the paper has any elements that have been plagiarized.
    • Some popular flagging software includes Writer’s AI Content Detector and Content at Scale’s AI Detector. For educators, we recommend having students turn in assignments through TurnItIn.com, this checks for plagiarism as well as how much of the assignment is AI-generated content.
  • Communicate your expectations surrounding homework and plagiarism from the start using our GKIS Connected Families Screen Agreement.
  • Sit with your child while they work on assignments to offer support as they need it, and be there before they decide to turn to AIs.
  • Manage smart devices during homework time using resources from our GKIS Screen Safety Toolkit.
  • Utilize ChatGPT in ways that allow it to be an educational tool, like writing ideas, creating to-do lists, and finding resources.
    • ChatGPT is a helpful tool for educational purposes when used properly. As a prompt-based language bot, it can be used to spruce up resumes or cover letters based on inputted job description data, help create outlines for papers based on inputted prompt data, and even provide recipes for weekly meals.
    • Promoting ChatGPT as an educational tool rather than a homework robot can prevent your child from creating an unhealthy dependence on AI software to do their work for them.

Like what you read? Check out our GKIS article “Siri and Alexa Help Kids Cheat on Homework”.

Thanks to CSUCI intern, Katherine Carroll for researching ChatGPT.

I’m the mom psychologist who will help you GetKidsInternetSafe.

Onward to More Awesome Parenting,

Tracy S. Bennett, Ph.D.
Mom, Clinical Psychologist, CSUCI Adjunct Faculty
GetKidsInternetSafe.com

Works Cited

[1] Ortiz, S. (2023). What is ChatGPT and why does it matter? Here’s what you need to know. ZDNET. https://www.zdnet.com/article/what-is-chatgpt-and-why-does-it-matter-heres-everything-you-need-to-know/

[2] Pocock, K. (2023). What Is ChatGPT? – what is it used for? PCguide. https://www.pcguide.com/apps/what-is-chat-gpt/

[3] ChatGPT. (2023, May 3). Write a few sentences on what ChatGPT is. Response to user question. Retrieved from https://chat.openai.com/

[4] Wehner, G. (2023). UK college student uses AI to write high-scoring essay, earns high grade: report. Fox Business. https://www.foxbusiness.com/technology/uk-college-student-ai-write-high-scoring-essay-report

[5] LilmaverickProf [@lilmaverick3]. (2023). AI detection now automated for educators #professor #Ai #chatgpt [Video]. TikTok. https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTRwx4R8f/

Photo Credits

Photo by Shantanu Kumar (https://unsplash.com/photos/_CquNNr1744)

Photo by Levart_Photographer (https://unsplash.com/photos/drwpcjkvxuU)

Photo by freestocks (https://unsplash.com/photos/I_pOqP6kCOI)

Photo by sofatutor (https://unsplash.com/photos/4r5Hogjbgkw)

What “Going Viral” Does to Your Brain and Self-Esteem

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Before the internet, “going viral” was not something positive much less something people actively sought out. “Going viral” has become a new age epidemic, with people doing whatever they can for their 60 seconds of fame. But what does “going viral” actually mean, and how does it affect our brains and our self-esteem? Today’s GKIS article will break down “going viral” and its effects. For help raising your child to be digitally smart, check out our GKIS Screen Safety Essentials Course. This course includes all GKIS parenting courses, agreements, and supplements, ensuring you are well-equipped to fight off digital injury and keep your child safe from harm.

What does it mean to “go viral”?

Going viral means sharing something via social media that spreads quickly to thousands, even millions of people. The term viral video was first used in 2009 to describe the video “David After Dentist.”[1]

One viral video or post can turn people into internet celebrities overnight and garner thousands of followers, resulting in brand deals and monetized content. Once a video goes viral, there is no limit to the number of people it will reach or even what platform they will see the video on. It is very common to see posts shared from one platform to the next, whether it be a TikTok on Twitter or a Tweet going viral on Instagram.

The number of views to be considered going viral also varies from platform to platform. One hundred thousand views on TikTok is pretty successful, whereas even a couple hundred thousand views on YouTube is a relatively low number.[2]

The number of likes is also an important factor. Many videos have a high number of views but a relatively low number of likes. These videos are not considered to be going viral because they are not well-received by the general public.[2] Engagement drives up the virality of the content through shares and comments that stimulate the algorithm to continue placing that content on people’s feeds.[2] Another important factor in going viral is the immediacy of response, meaning that the views, likes, and comments must be received within a few hours to days rather than over several months or years.[2]

How does “going viral” affect our brains?

When your video, post, or other content “goes viral,” you receive likes, comments, reposts, shares, and bookmarks. These response notifications prompt the reward systems in our brains.[3] Many fast notifications results in dopamine release. To keep that feel-good feeling going, we keep checking, acting in a way similar to gambling addictions.[3]

Algorithms also take advantage of a variable-reward system because they are programmed to recognize when to take advantage of our reward system and desire for dopamine.[3] This often results in a stockpile of notifications that get delayed until a good amount of time since the last check has passed or a large amount of engagement has accumulated.

For a personal insight into going viral, I interviewed a college student who had recently experienced the sensation of going viral. They said, “I recently had a video go viral on TikTok. It was a video of the Indie-Rock band Boygenius and one of their members, singer Phoebe Bridgers, singing a verse from their song ‘Cool About It.’ I had taken the video at a concert I had recently attended and decided to post it on TikTok since I was lucky enough to be pretty close to the stage. Over the next few days after I posted it, it got 118k views, 32k likes, and 500 comments, and was saved by more than 4000 people. Once it started picking up traction, I became obsessed with checking my notifications and seeing all the new comments. I would constantly look to see how many views I was at each hour. I even got a like from a TikTok creator who I really enjoy so that was very exciting for me.”

Although going viral is thrilling, notifications can be harmful when they are overly distracting.[4] To compensate for smartphone interruptions, studies have shown that people often work faster, resulting in more stress, frustration, time pressure, and effort.[4] Research has linked daily notifications and their interruptions to depression, anxiety, and even symptoms associated with ADHD.[5]

Our interview also revealed that the euphoria of going viral is short-lived and needs constant “re-upping.” Our subject elaborated, “Once the video started to die down though, I got annoyed by the notifications. They were distracting because they were so far and few in-between and nothing quite as exciting as the start. I got kinda sad that my viral moment was dying down. It made me want to post another video to see if it would get the same kind of attention.”

What does “going viral” do to our self-esteem?

Studies have shown that social media can be both detrimental to our self-esteem and boost it at the same time, but how does going viral change that?

Social media usage can add stress to daily life and encourage people to constantly evaluate and compare themselves to others.[6] When someone goes viral, they open themselves up to being judged by thousands of people, some of whom can be cruel, feeling emboldened by the veil of anonymity. While many would agree that the likes and views one receives on a viral post boosts their self-esteem and makes one feel good about themselves, it also allows for internet trolls to make their way into the comment section to bait others into an argument or provoke an emotional reaction.[7]

One-in-five internet users that have been victims of harassment online reported that it happened in the comment section of a website.[8] Reading negative comments can lessen confidence, reduce self-esteem, and depending on the severity, can even provoke suicidal thoughts.[9]

Our GKIS interviewee unfortunately also had experience with the negative side of going viral. They reported, “Before my video went super viral, I had posted another video that didn’t get as many views but still got a couple thousand views, a few hundred likes, and a good amount of comments. The video was clips of my girlfriend and me in celebration of our second anniversary. For the most part, the comments were really nice, with people calling us cute and being supportive. But after a little while of it being up, it got to the wrong side of TikTok. As a queer couple, we’re used to people being rude or staring at us, but to get negative comments just hurt more for some reason. This was a few months ago, but I still think about the comments from time to time. It honestly made me want to delete the whole video even though it was just a few comments out of a bunch of nice ones.”

How Parents Can Help

  • Understand that what you and your child post has the potential to go viral, even if you don’t want it to.
  • Set the privacy settings on posts to control who gets to see the content you share.
  • Prevent a digital injury to your child’s self-esteem before it occurs with our GKIS Screen Safety Toolkit for parents of kids of all ages.
  • To help facilitate difficult conversations about online content and who should see it, try out our free GKIS Connected Family Screen Agreement.

Like what you read? Check out our GKIS articles “Showcasing Child Talent Online Leads to Exploitation and Scams” and “Influencers Hurt Child Self Esteem by Overusing Filters”.

Thanks to CSUCI intern, Katherine Carroll for researching “going viral” and its effect on the brain and self-esteem.

I’m the mom psychologist who will help you GetKidsInternetSafe.

Onward to More Awesome Parenting,

Tracy S. Bennett, Ph.D.
Mom, Clinical Psychologist, CSUCI Adjunct Faculty
GetKidsInternetSafe.com

Works Cited

[1] Wonderopolis. (2022). What Does It Mean To Go Viral? Wonderopolis. https://www.wonderopolis.org/wonder/what-does-it-mean-to-go-viral

[2] Pigeon Studio. (2022). How many views is viral? What makes a video viral? Pigeon Studio. https://studiopigeon.com/blog/how-many-views-is-viral-what-makes-a-video-viral/

[3] Haynes, T. (2018). Dopamine, Smartphones & You: A battle for your time. Science in the News. https://sitn.hms.harvard.edu/flash/2018/dopamine-smartphones-battle-time/

[4] Pandey, N (2022). Constant Distraction And Stress, App Notifications Affect Minds Negatively: Study. NDTV. https://www.ndtv.com/world-news/constant-distraction-and-stress-app-notifications-affect-minds-negatively-study-3595177#:~:text=According%20to%20a%20study%2C%20these,shown%20to%20damage%20task%20performance.

[5] Glick, M. (2022). Phone Notifications Are Messing With Your Brain. Discover. https://www.discovermagazine.com/technology/phone-notifications-are-messing-with-your-brain

[6] Bergman, M. (2023). Social Media’s Effects on Self-Esteem. Social Media Victims Law Center. https://socialmediavictims.org/mental-health/self-esteem/

[7] Australian Government. (2022). Trolling. eSafety Commissioner. https://www.esafety.gov.au/young-people/trolling#:~:text=Something%20has%20happened-,What%20is%20trolling%3F,believe%2C%20just%20to%20cause%20drama.

[7] Australian Government. (2022). Trolling. eSafety Commissioner. https://www.esafety.gov.au/young-people/trolling#:~:text=Something%20has%20happened-,What%20is%20trolling%3F,believe%2C%20just%20to%20cause%20drama

[8] Aleksandra. (2016). How reading online comments affects us. Social Media Psychology. https://socialmediapsychology.eu/2016/10/05/onlineandsocialmediacomments/

[9] Cuncic, A. (2022). Mental Health Effects of Reading Negative Comments Online. VeryWellMind. https://www.verywellmind.com/mental-health-effects-of-reading-negative-comments-online-5090287#:~:text=If%20you%20end%20up%20reading,and%20after%20reading%20comments%20online

Photo Credits

Photo by Good Faces (https://unsplash.com/photos/Lv2lW5ImegQ)

Photo by Christian Wiediger (https://unsplash.com/photos/NmGzVG5Wsg8)

Photo by Robina Weermeijer (https://unsplash.com/photos/3KGF9R_0oHs)

Photo by Cristina Zaragoza (https://unsplash.com/photos/cMVRsfY8R3Q)

Photo by Levi Perchik (https://unsplash.com/photos/5gHdYqpALTY)

Popular YouTube Channel ‘Ms. Rachel’ is Teaching Infants to Talk Early

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Millennial parents are constantly looking for ways to “life-hack” their parenting and make parenthood a breeze. YouTube channel ‘Ms. Rachel’ is the newest of the tools parents are utilizing, and the results are astonishing. Parents all over social media are praising ‘Ms. Rachel’ for teaching their children to talk (along with teaching skills like sign language). Virtual learning tools are a great way to help supplement the education your child receives, but with screen time comes burnout. To prevent screen time burnout for your child, try our safe-screen home setup and management with our GKIS Connected Family Course, suitable for parents with toddlers to teens.

Who is ‘Ms. Rachel’?

‘Ms. Rachel’ is a teacher who created “Songs for Littles,” a YouTube channel that has 3.03 million subscribers and 1.7 billion views despite only having 102 videos made since its creation in early 2019.[1] Rachel Griffin Accurso (Ms. Rachel) creates educational videos that are backed by research and learning standards important for babies, toddlers, and preschoolers with the help of a large team. Accurso has a masters degree in music education from NYU and is currently working on her second masters in early childhood education.[2]

Accurso was motivated to create the channel after her own son was diagnosed with a speech delay. Her son inspired her to create a show to encourage language development and help children reach important learning milestones.[3] Accurso employs psychological principles like mirroring and encourages viewers to follow along with her sign and body language to build speech and language skills. Mirroring involves the mimicry of reflecting speech or behavior to help children learn to develop skills on their own.[4]

Social Media Praise

Parents all over social media have sung high praise for Ms. Rachel, even crediting her for being the reason their children say their first words. Beyond just speaking, users have also shared videos of their kids expressing themselves using sign language.

TikTok user Cw1908 shared a video of her 2-year-old daughter signing and saying, “I want more milk, I want more.”[5] The comments of the video are filled with parents sharing their experiences with Ms. Rachel as well. TikTok user Yesys13 writes, “OMG! My daughter is almost 3 and has a speech delay. Mrs. Rachel has helped her communicate with us a lot easier without frustration!”[6] User Sweetness.103 writes, “I play Ms. Rachel and my baby can read for my grandbaby.”[7]

Even parents who are cautious about screen time in infanthood share their praise for Ms. Rachel and share that the benefits outweigh their anxieties. TikTok user Nataliaa_calles shared, “I was very hesitant to allow screen time with Ivy. I heard many kids’ shows become addictive. I researched a lot of different YouTubers to help my daughter’s brain development, and Ms. Rachel was the best. Ivyanah has now learned ‘momma’ (6 months old). She’s been saying it for weeks now.”[8]

Ms. Rachel’s videos seem to help both children who are just developing their language skills and those who are developmentally delayed. Comment by user Irisloc112 on the aforementioned video states, “My son has no word at almost 3. We started watching Ms. Rachel, and now he doesn’t stop talking 5 months later.”[9]

It is not just moms on TikTok who are praising Ms. Rachel. Jasmin, 27, shared with GKIS all about how her child has learned to talk with the help of Ms. Rachel’s videos. “I started playing Ms. Rachel for my son when he was about 3 months old. I heard good reviews about Ms. Rachel and how she teaches kids important skills such as speech, movements, and emotions. I thought it was a great way for my son to learn at an early stage. From watching Ms. Rachel’s videos my son has learned how to say ‘Mama’ and ‘Dada’. His first word was ‘Mama’ at 7 months old. He always laughs and talks while I have Ms. Rachel playing on the TV. I would recommend Ms. Rachel’s videos because I believe they can help many kids who are behind in speech development or any kids who are struggling to express their feelings and emotions.”

It turns out that grandparents are crazy for Ms. Rachel too! Dr. Bennett shared that she just returned from a weekend vacation with her first grandchild and said that is the one show that keeps his attention the whole time. She found herself singing along and repeating Ms. Rachel along with him. He too is signing as well as talking and singing.

Benefits of Teaching Language Early

Most infants begin babbling around 4 months of age and say their first recognizable word around 12 to 18 months old.[10] Babies learn speech through socialization and the world around them. They closely watch their parents’ reactions to sounds and conversations with others. Through this observation, babies begin to mimic and mirror the people around them.[11] The most effective way to help your child learn to speak is by spending time talking and interacting with them. However, all parents need a break, so having an occasional virtual “co-parent” can help a lot.

Delayed speech development is associated with developmental risks down the line such as academic difficulties, learning disabilities, social difficulties, anxiety, and behavioral problems.[12] By teaching your child to learn language early, you can help to avoid these risks and reap all the benefits of early language development. Research has shown that developing a large vocabulary increases creativity.[13] Language development also helps children understand and process their emotions, analyze ideas, develop critical thinking skills, and set the foundation for most future learning.[14]

 If you are worried about your child developing a digital injury such as screen addiction while utilizing virtual learning tools, check out our GKIS Screen Safety Essentials Course. Co-viewing the content your child is consuming and using to learn can help your child avoid burnout. When you’re tired of watching a screen, they probably are too!

Like what you read? Check out our GKIS articles “Dr. Bennett’s Developmental Psychology Crash Course for Children Ages 0-2 Years” and “GKIS Recommended Apps of Child Social and Emotional Learning”.

Thanks to CSUCI intern, Katherine Carroll for researching Ms. Rachel and language development. 

I’m the mom psychologist who will help you GetKidsInternetSafe.

Onward to More Awesome Parenting, 

Tracy S. Bennett, Ph.D.
Mom, Clinical Psychologist, CSUCI Adjunct Faculty
GetKidsInternetSafe.com

Works Cited

[1] Songs for Littles – Toddler Learning Videos. (2023). YouTube. https://www.youtube.com/@msrachel/about

[2] Songs for Littles – Learn, Bond, Thrive: About Us. (2023). Songs For Littles. https://www.songsforlittles.com/bios

[3] Hanson, K. (2022). Who is Ms. Rachel and why are your kids obsessed with her? Today.

https://www.today.com/parents/family/who-is-ms-rachel-rcna60194

[4] APA Dictionary of Psychology. (2023). American Psychological Association. https://dictionary.apa.org/mirroring

[5] Watkins, C. [@cw1908]. (2023). Its time for songs for littlessss!! #MrsRachel #songsforlittles #signlanguage #Shadybaby @Ms Rachel [Video]. TikTok. https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTRWNRVM4/

[6] Rico, Yesi. [@yesys13]. (2023). Re: Its time for songs for littlessss!! #MrsRachel #songsforlittles #signlanguage #Shadybaby @Ms Rachel [Video]. TikTok. https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTRWNRVM4/
[7] Ronnie. [@sweetness.103]. (2023). Re: Its time for songs for littlessss!! #MrsRachel #songsforlittles #signlanguage #Shadybaby @Ms Rachel [Video]. TikTok. https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTRWNRVM4/

[8] Calles, N. [@nataliaa_calles]. (2022). Thank you @Ms Rachel #6months [Video]. TikTok.https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTRWNkK3K/

[9] Loc, I. [@irisloc112]. (2022). Re: Thank you @Ms Rachel #6months [Video]. TikTok. https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTRWNkK3K/

[10] Reece, T. (2022). When Do Babies Start Talking? Parents. https://www.parents.com/baby/development/talking/when-do-babies-start-talking/

[11] When do babies start talking? (2023). Children’s Health. https://www.childrens.com/health-wellness/when-do-babies-start-talking

[12] The Importance of Language Development in Early Childhood. (2017). Adam and Mila. https://www.adam-mila.com/importance-language-development-early-childhood/

[13] The Whole Child – For Early Care Providers – Let’s Talk About It. (2023). PBS. https://www.pbs.org/wholechild/providers/talk.html

[14] Stephens, K. (2007). Language Is a Powerful Influence on Children’s Development. Parenting Exchange. https://www.easternflorida.edu/community-resources/child-development-centers/parent-resource-library/documents/language-child-development.pdf

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