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GKIS Now More Than EVER!

In a time of online learning your child’s safety is vital, and GKIS is needed more than ever. Enjoy a highlight of Dr. B’s News Reels! With over 25 years in private practice, Dr. Bennett is seeing more families in crisis due to internet safety problems. To prevent digital injury, she developed GetKidsInternetSafe.com! When it’s your kids ON-the-LINE GetKidsInternetSafe.com

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A Day At The Office

Join us in a special Vlog style episode where Dr. Tracy Bennett visits her CSUCI office after a year of in-home schooling due to COVID-19. Tune in and get to know  more about Cal State Channel Islands. www.GetKidsInternetSafe.com In over 25 years of practice, Dr. Bennett is seeing more families in crisis due to Internet safety problems. To help families prevent digital injury, she developed GetKidsInternetSafe.com! When it’s your kids ON-the-LINE GetKidsInternetSafe.com

Link to the Screen Safety Essentials Course 👇

https://getkidsinternetsafe.com/essentials-course/

Link to Website 👇

https://getkidsinternetsafe.com

Link to Book 👇

https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/099…

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Working From Home Pt.II – Dr. Bennett

COVID-19 has been an unprecedented moment for all of us. Join Dr. Tracy Bennett as she works from home and reminisces about why she founded GetKidsInternetSafe. You’ll see the passion she has for helping children and families avoid risks from the dark web and screen addiction. In over 25 years of practice, Dr. Bennett is seeing more families in crisis due to Internet safety problems. To help families prevent digital injuries, she developed GetKidsInternetSafe.com!
When it’s your kids ON-the-LINE GetKidsInternetSafe.com Link to Screen Safety Essentials Course 👇 https://getkidsinternetsafe.com/essentials-course/
Follow Our Social Media:

Working From Home – Dr. Bennett

COVID-19 has been an unprecedented moment for all of us. Join Dr. Tracy Bennett as she works from home and reminisces about why she founded GetKidsInternetSafe. You’ll see the passion she has for helping children and families avoid risks from the dark web and screen addiction. In over 25 years of practice, Dr. Bennett is seeing more families in crisis due to Internet safety problems. To help families prevent digital injuries, she developed GetKidsInternetSafe.com! When it’s your kids ON-the-LINE GetKidsInternetSafe.com
Link to Screen Safety Essentials Course 👇
Link to Book 👇
Follow Our Social Media:

Are We All Prone to Addictions?

It’s easy to think that only people who make a series of bad choices become addicts. After all, hard work in recovery seems to switch things around for even the most hardcore addict. But brain research is uncovering processes that demonstrate the same areas in the brain for drug addiction are activated when using social media and other addictive behaviors. For some, genetic inheritance makes them particularly susceptible. Psychological research is also showing the environment plays a big role in sustaining addictive behaviors. Further, using an addictive substance can change your brain wiring immediately. With each use, that change becomes even more pronounced. That means that one momentary lapse of decision-making alters the way you experience reward and punishment. That is why experts say addiction is a disease rather than a moral failing. Once bitten, the addictive drug or behavior behaves more like a disease process. Overcoming the symptoms becomes far more difficult than a simple choice. In today’s article find out the brain processes behind addiction to understand how we are all susceptible. Then I explain the importance the environment plays on addictive behaviors and theories from the father of positive psychology, Martin Seligman. After reading the article, you will know the secret inoculation to online addictions…and it’s not what you’d expect.

What is a behavioral addiction?

Behavioral addictions involve behaviors like gambling, video gaming, shopping, exercise, food, and internet and social media use. “Our brains are made to respond to rewards, which then motivates our actions. Rewards are a brilliant solution to ensure we will do behaviors that are indispensable for the individual and the species.”[1]

For our ancestors, finding foods that tasted sweet meant the food was safe to eat and triggered a rewarding, pleasurable feeling. Once rewarded, we encode a pleasant experience to memory. Now the memory is pleasurable even when the food is nowhere around. In our modern on-demand society, we are surrounded by virtual rewards on our screens, including data about the steps we walk, the calories we eat, and the likes on social media.[2]

Dopamine’s role in reward and punishment has helped us survive.

The neurotransmitter, dopamine, is a primary factor behind reward and punishment. This chemical is released in our brains when we encounter an uncomfortable stimulus, like being chased by a bear, or pleasurable stimulus, like finding berries in the wilderness. Once stimulated, we remember that information for future use. Evolutionarily speaking, these actions helped us identify edible foods, select the right partners, and avoid predators.

Dopamine is also involved in other critical functions, including movement, memory, attention, motivation, arousal, and sleep regulation.[3] Not only is dopamine released when we experience pleasure, but neuroscientists have also found that simply anticipating a reward causes dopamine release. In some circumstances, almost getting the reward is even more reinforcing than actually experiencing the reward. For example, we may be rewarded for posting on social media just by anticipating the “likes” we may receive. Another example was recognized by Netflix producers. They discovered that watching a series cliffhangers is just as satisfying to customers as watching the problem being solved during the following episode.[4]

With periodic dopamine stimulation from experiencing reward, anticipating a reward, and remembering reward, the stage is set to develop behavioral addictions.

The conditioned response of dopamine release makes leaving a rewarding task harder to do. So we seek it, keep on doing it, and miss it when we don’t have it.

How does our evolutionary-based brain wiring lead to behavioral addiction?

In a study conducted at the National Institute on Drug Abuse, Dr. Volkow found behavioral and substance addicted individuals showed a reduction in dopamine D2 receptors. These receptors regulate the frontal part of our brain that allows us to exert self-control. With repeated and frequent administrations of dopamine, the brain progressively loses these D2 receptors.[5] With the desensitization due to lost receptors, we experience a “ludic loop,” a kind of hypnotic state that occurs when we are hooked in doing something with no real reward. Being in a ludic loop is like being trapped in an empty state of limbo, which is characteristic of addictive behavior.[6] The first high sets the trap, and from then on you are simply going through the motions unable to get out.

Furthermore, these brain patterns tap into the oldest parts of our reptilian brain as well as the newer cerebral cortex that surrounds it. With addiction highjacking the emotional seat of our brain (the limbic system) and our control center (the prefrontal region), we lock into reward pursuit and avoid actions that are less likely to bring a reward.[7] Our wiring is built to lock us into these patterns based on evolutionary principles.

Our environment also makes a difference.

A classic 1950s experiment that illustrates addiction involves rats pushing a lever for water or water laced with cocaine. Rats will choose water laced with cocaine over all other stimuli, resulting in a dead rat. But in the 1970s, a psychologist named Bruce Alexander noticed that these experiments were always done in empty cages. Nothing in the rat’s environment was meaningful but the drug. He wondered if this was because of the appeal of drug or could it be because of the environment they were in?

He tested his theory by building “rat parks,” where the rats had everything that makes a rat’s life worth living. They were equipped with exercise wheels, colored balls, and other rats to socialize and mate with. Then he set up the two kinds of waters. The researcher found that when the experiment was administered in “rat park”, the rats had stopped preferring the water with the drug in it. He took this outcome as an illustration that a meaningful environment can influence the pursuit of addictive behaviors. “The opposite of addiction is not sobriety, it is a sense of meaning and connection with others.”[8]

The brain hacks baked into screen technology and how they are impacting us.

In the digital age, we have multiple real-life and virtual identities where cookies mean very different things. We are motivated by online rewards just as we are offline. Programmers and developers have found ways to continually bombard us with new types of rewards like “likes” on social media and “kills” in video games. The first time these activities brought us pleasure, a path was forged for compulsive reward-seeking online.

It’s not unhealthy to seek pleasure that has meaning and brings you happiness, the problem is that the resulting addictive behaviors rarely provide us with meaning. The passion fades to a dull pursuit of something less than we felt initially. It’s the classic chasing of that first high.

To reverse that process, some must detox from that behavior and cultivate an environment rich in meaning so we do not return to the addictive cycle. Instead of a sterile room with one lever that delivers digital cocaine, we must invest in a room rich with opportunity for creativity, socialization, good food, exercise, rejuvenating sleep, productivity, and play.

Three Paths to Happiness

Dr. Martin Seligman, the father of Positive Psychology, studies resilience. He believes there are three paths for the pursuit of happiness, the pleasant life, the good life, and the meaningful life. To inoculate oneself from addiction, one must have a good or meaningful life characterized by personal meaning.

The Pleasant Life

Dr. Seligman describes the pleasant life as the pursuit of pleasurable things. This life revolves around the “ludic loops” of social media likes, endless dating, partying, and learning the skills to amplify them. This life is “not very modifiable.” It makes one vulnerable to routine, addictions, and obsession.

Online, people are extrinsically rewarded through the “likes” of other people and “views” they obtained in their profiles, continuing the habit even after knowing they no longer want to.[9] The person becomes unable to reliably predict when the behavior will occur, how long it will go on, and when it will stop. The problem with the life of pleasure is that it’s hedonistic and lacks meaningfulness.

The Good Life

Dr. Seligman describes the good life with having an “engagement to one’s work, where the individual may be so involved in his craft, that time stops for him,” a harmonious passion where the individual works to strive without the need of feeling obligated or forced. [10]  There are no positive emotions, instead it is characterized by flow, a concept first identified by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi in 1990.

Flow is a mental state of intense concentration where the individual is incredibly focused on an enjoyable activity. They are, “in the zone.” This idea has been around for thousands of years and was predominate in eastern cultures. Flow is distinct from pleasure because, during flow, you can’t feel anything.

The Meaningful Life

Dr. Seligman explains the meaningful life as when an individual knows their highest strengths and use them to belong to and be of the service to something larger than themselves.[13] This is important because it provides an individual meaning in life through helping others and having a positive effect in the world, something a life of pleasure cannot provide.

We can’t rely on technology to give us meaning.

Technology is great for instant gratification when we need it. It’s not only the screen itself that is so addictive but the content that is accessible on it. We use technology when we have a psychological need when we feel confused about what to do next, or when we feel we have no effect on the world. Adam Atler describes how these are the moments when we’re most prone to developing behavioral addictions. He analogizes technology as being an “adult pacifier. It soothes and calms our minds by delivering small hits of bottomless entertainment and information.”[14] It characterizes a pleasurable life.

Of course, screens and technology are not all bad. They enable us to be connected with our loved ones and offer apps for health, reading, exercise, meditation, the weather, and education. Technology isn’t the source of meaning, rather it is a bridge to the tasks that bring us meaning, the tasks that allow us to develop a skill and have a positive effect on the world.

Are you using tech as a bridge to a meaningful life, or are you still stuck in the pursuit of pleasure?

Thanks to Andrew Weissmann for writing this important GKIS article.

I’m the mom psychologist who will help you GetKidsInternetSafe.

Onward to More Awesome Parenting

Tracy S. Bennett, Ph.D.
Mom, Clinical Psychologist, CSUCI Adjunct Faculty
GetKidsInternetSafe.com

Works Cited

[1] Why we get addicted? TEDMED By: Nora Volkow

[2] Irresistible By: Adam Atler

[3] 2-min. Neuroscience: Dopamine By Neuroscientifically Challenged

[4] Irresistible By: Adam Atler

[5] ncbi.nlm.nih.gov Imaging the Addicted Human Brain by J.S. Fowler, N.D. Volkow, C.A. Kassed, L. Chang

[6] Medium.com By Matilda Zhang

[7] 2-min Neuroscience: Nucleus Accumbens by Neuroscientifically Challenged

[8] Ted Talk Everything you think you know about addiction is wrong by Johann Hari

[9] Science Saturday Why do We Get Addicted?

[10] Ted The new era of Positive Psychology By Martin Seligman

[11] Ted The new era of Positive Psychology By Martin Seligman

[12] Ted The new era of Positive Psychology By Martin Seligman

[13] Ted The new era of Positive Psychology By Martin Seligman

[14] Big Think Digital Addiction: How Half the Developed World Got Hooked on the Internet By Adam Atler

Photo Credits

  1. unsplash by jeshoots.com
  2. flickr by Lucy Finle
  3. flickr by Dr. Jonathan B. Lauter
  4. flickr by NIH Image Gallery
  5. flickr by Kristin Gao
  6. flickr by Mike Licht
  7. Chris Weissmann by Zach Haggy
  8. burst.shopify.com by Nicole De Khors

Is Facebook Messenger Kids Harmless Fun or a Gateway Drug for Compulsive Social Media Use?

Facebook recently launched Messenger Kids, a free, stand-alone video chat and messaging app for children ages 6 to 12 to “connect with people they love but also has the level of control parents want.” Designed with kid preferences in mind, this app aims to please with one-to-one and group video chat or text thread, fun filters, masks, stickers and GIFs. Facebook says they have integrated features with the consult of a 100-member team with child safety and privacy in mind. Although I welcome the integration of kid-friendly features (finally!) that doesn’t sell to kids or collect information for marketing, introducing young children to a screen activity may be distracting at the least and addictive at the worst. Having participated with a team of experts talking about Messenger Kids, I believe Facebook has developed a much-needed product that can be very positive when used optimally with parent guidance.

Why now?

Historically, kids have been restricted from social media app membership without parental consent because of The Children’s Online Privacy Act (COPPA, 1998). This federal law imposes certain requirements on operators of websites or online services, like not collecting data from or advertising to children under thirteen years of age. Facebook is compliant with COPPA in that Messenger Kids won’t show ads, offer in-app purchases, or collect data for marketing. Also, in order to adopt the app, kids must have parent permission as an extension of the parent’s Facebook profile. Other safety features include parent control over their child’s contact list, child inability to delete messages, and an option to block users and report inappropriate content with parent notification. Kids can be found through Facebook search and parents must ask permission to see kid content to avoid spying. Facebook also says they won’t automatically upgrade users to an adult account when the child reaches 13 years old.

What are the privacy risks?

In response to privacy and security concerns, Democratic Sens. Ed Markey and Richard Blumenthal asked Facebook to specify what data is collected and what they’re planning to do with it, if information about child device location is being collected and stored, and whether Messenger Kids will be walled off from the Internet. Facebook has said collected information will only be used for infrastructure purposes to improve the app.

What are the behavioral risks?

As a clinical psychologist and screen safety expert, I am pleased that Facebook has delivered a product with child safety in mind. After all, surveys reveal that most kids are using apps before age thirteen that don’t have safety features. Messenger Kids offers families an option without the same risk profile as Instagram, Snapchat, Twitter, or KIK. However, there are still some risks to consider before allowing your child to adopt Messenger Kids.

First, we are all well aware of the compulsive nature of social media use. According to Apple, we check our iPhones an average of 80 times a day, 30,000 times a year.[i] Nearly 60% of parents think their teens are addicted to their mobile devices.[ii] With features specifically designed to keep people using, social media can lead to addictive use patterns that distract us from healthier activities and nonvirtual relationships. The younger the brain, the higher the vulnerability to habit formation and brain wiring changes. I’m not entirely satisfied with the argument that without this, kids are going to use less safe social media anyway. It’s kind of like letting your teen drink at your house since they’re going to do it anyway…Maybe the answer is don’t let them drink in the first place.

Do we really want children as young as six years old to have that kind of opportunity?

After all, child screen use is so new we have no idea what kind of long-term impact these kind of use patterns will have. Behavioral conditioning is an intentionally embedded component of  Silicon Valley tech products to increase profits. I believe the old adage, “If you can’t see the product, you are the product” may apply here. Furthermore, just because parents can monitor child behavior doesn’t mean kids won’t impulsively offer or view inappropriate or embarrassing information that can lead to shame and cyberbullying. The younger the child, the higher the risk. As a parent, are you ready for your child to adopt the “training wheels” for social media independence?

On the other hand, we must keep in mind that Messenger Kids is a messaging app, not a social media app. Parents have full monitoring control and must approve the contact list. This app is a fun way for kids to connect to other kids and family members, with playful adjunct features like masks and stickers. Facebook has said that this is not a product designed to profit off of children. Instead, Facebook believes it is good business to build products that people love to use.

Things I learned when Facebook asked me to participate in a working session with child and technology experts:

I believe that the best outcomes are reached through collaboration from people of all different viewpoints. As a result, I was very pleased to accept the invitation of Facebook to participate in a discussion with a panel of experts. I believe that being a part of the solution means getting in there and working with industry, academia, and with front-line teachers and practitioners. Obviously, I am under the restrictions that are typical of nondisclosure agreements when one works with a company about a product. However, it is appropriate to share my impressions having interacted with Antigone Davis, Head of Global Safety for Facebook, and the Facebook employees who have developed and continue to work on Messenger Kids.

I am somewhat unique in that I have lots of day jobs, all relating to psychology and families. I have had a private practice for over 23 years working with kids, teens, and adults. I teach addiction studies, parenting, and clinical psychology at CSUCI and supervise interns writing from a screen-media research perspective, and I’m founder of GetKidsInternetSafe, my love project. I’m fond of saying that I’m the MacGyver of psychology in that I take the theories and research findings from academia and apply them to real people in my practice, adjusting and tweaking as I go. From this perspective, I have a lot of opinions about the benefits and risks of screen activities to the American family.

Having interacted with the impressive panel of experts Facebook invited to the Facebook Global Safety Summit, I came away with the feeling that Facebook is being thoughtful and open about their child products. They are conducting their own research, generously open to feedback, and clearly dedicated to an ongoing dialogue about what families want and need. Let’s face it, they are experts with what they do and have enormous reach. I believe they have the potential to provide positive child and family service, and they’re taking that role seriously. As the company has matured, they seem to realize that they have a precious social responsibility to their customers and were very enthusiastic to hear from those of us who have dedicated our careers to child and family advocacy. I’m feeling pretty good about Messenger Kids, yet believe that kids and parents still need more education and support to best implement this fun communication tool while optimizing learning and connection on screen and off screen.

What should you keep in mind if you want to try out Messenger Kids for interactive digital play?

  • Stay engaged during the on-boarding process and visit the Messenger Kids FAQ page.

  • Recognize that this app was not designed for education, but rather as an alternative to adult social media apps that kids were already using. Not only must parents create a Facebook profile for Messenger Kids setup (another customer?), but Facebook branding has just been launched in your child’s tender consciousness. Ready, set, go!

  • Start a teaching dialogue about privacy, marketing, and balance. Familiarize your kids with the rules at a developmentally optimal level for their age and understanding.

  • Adopt the GKIS Living Agreement digital contract found in my book, Screen Time in the Mean Time: A Parent Guide to Get Kids and Teens Internet Safe.

  • Once on-boarded, your child has launched a dynamic digital footprint within the walled garden of their contact list. This may be their first introduction to digital messaging. Exciting yes, but supervision and building teaching opportunities are important for positive outcome.

  • Set up a creativity kit next to the computer with play props, dress up clothes, art materials, and toys. When you are having a conversation on Messenger Kids, encourage your child to act out a fun, creative activity like pretending to prepare and serve you lunch, writing a poem and presenting it, or choreographing a dance. Augmenting virtual reality with fun nonvirtual reality keep kids engaged with a balanced life of two-dimensional and three-dimensional play. Building relationships and play are still critical learning opportunities for the developing brain.

  • Watch to make sure your child doesn’t exhibits behaviors suggestive of compulsive use or addictive patterns.

  • Encourage your child to attend to the other person’s words, facial expressions, and feelings while chatting. Recognize that fun animations may be distracting, so they need your prompts and teaching narrative to learn social skills and digital citizenship.

  • Most importantly, offer an enriching balance of virtual with nonvirtual activities, a key to healthy development.

For additional information about another popular child app, check out The GKIS Sensible Parent’s Guide to Musical.ly.

I’m the mom psychologist who will help you GetKidsInternetSafe.

Onward to More Awesome Parenting,
Tracy S. Bennett, Ph.D.
Mom, Clinical Psychologist, CSUCI Adjunct Faculty
GetKidsInternetSafe.com

Works Cited

[i] Bajarin, B. (2016). “Apple’s Penchant for Consumer Security.” Tech.pinions, 18 Apr. 2016, techpinions.com/apples-penchant-for-consumer-security/45122.

[ii] Common Sense (2015). The Common Sense Census: Media Use by Teens & Tweens. www.commonsensemedia.org/sites/default/files/uploads/research/census_executivesummary.pdf

Photo Credits

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