7 GetKidsInternetSafe Tips for Summer

Summer has arrived and parents everywhere are alight with anticipation and dread. It’s your job to be a good-enough parent, not a perfect one. Here are 7 GetKidsInternetSafe guidelines to help.

We are a week into summer at our house, and it has started already; that nagging guilt I feel to keep my kids happy while juggling my job, marriage, friendships, and sanity. The dreaded “bored” word hangs over my head like a dead tree limb ready to snap. Help!

There are always the über moms who had it together two months ago and scheduled Cantonese class, violin lessons, and sailing camp. Having a twenty year-old and being in session with the übers, I am over the fantasy that I am that mom. And frankly, I’m happy to say so, because that impossible expectation leads these beautiful, ambitious souls to have two gigantic glasses of wine every night and chases their husbands into the garage, as her resentment poisons the room. The sadly ironic fact is that a mother’s love for her children inspires her intensity. One or two activities at a time, please. Unscheduled time is valuable for healthy development.

And please know, writing these pieces makes me gag a little. Because I am the first to say I’m a good-enough mom, but far from perfect. I do and say things often that I have to apologize for and wish I could take back. But there are other times when I grin at myself because my babies are giddy little souls who wrestle puppies, build sky castles of hot lava on their computers, and climb trees.

My GetKidsInternetSafe guidelines should be read as they are intended; to give you permission to be happy outside of your parenting role while being proud and delighted with what you do pull off. And know that these are guidelines. Adopt what you want, how you want. Nothing is more valuable than your organic parenting instinct.

Practice mindfulness.

Stop, attend to the present, breathe from your diaphragm with a 6-second exhale, and fill your heart with the love of your children. This will help you set your priorities and keep you from becoming a screeching, bossy lunatic.

DJ.

Nothing gets the house rockin’ like some Elton John and a parent who sings badly. A little Earth, Wind, and Fire also inspires the spirit to soar through clumsy interpretive dance. As my dad used to say while we happily hustled around his knees, “It isn’t dancin’ unless your shoulders are movin!”

12:00-3:00 no screen time.

Be warned, the first couple days they will sit on the couch moaning in agony and run through every manipulative strategy they have in their brilliant cognitive toolboxes. Don’t cave! Eventually they will climb trees, read books, and wrestle until lamps break, as kids should. <note Brady Bunch reference>

One educational lesson a day.

It doesn’t have to be a kill and drill workbook though. Maybe 10 minutes on an educational or exploratory app like Google Earth or a TED talk. My kids like TED talks, and they give us something to discuss other than “kid stuff” that makes my eyes glaze over.

Kids need sun and run.

Schedule a nature event at least once a week, if not every day. Maybe you can’t pull off the beach or the mountains, but you certainly can take a walk around the block or visit a park to have a picnic.

When they beg not to go with, make them anyway.

We went to a concert in the park last night with our kids sulking in tow, and heck if they didn’t have a wildly fabulous time sitting on the blanket, playing tag, and eating chicken tostada salads and popcorn. Glow sticks, not to mention the horror of your parents dancing with a clumsy herd of friends in front of EVERYBODY, were a bonus. By the end they were spinning and hopping with us as well. My heart burst a bunch of times and my soul paid rapt attention and soaked it in. These moments are precious, but they sometimes have to be staged.

Treat the word “bored” as a cuss word.

It’s not allowed in our house and will immediately result in a consequence. Because first of all, that’s not MY problem. And secondly, the stinkin’ thinkin’ will make them miserable. So nip it in the bud.

Make sure you’ve subscribed to www.GetKidsInternetSafe.com for your free copy of “The Top 10 Mistakes Parents Make With Internet Safety (and How to Recover!). And please share your summer ideas with the GetKidsInternetSafe village. Cheers to making sunbaked, juicy life memories with your babies. (That tree pic is my son in the tree before school. I took it from my bedroom window). 🙂